German fiction -- Translations into English; Germany. Heer -- Fiction
"Ah, how happy I was!" repeated Hannah, with a sigh. "But the serpent
lurked in my Paradise. I came to know the pangs of jealousy, and I
hated Marie Falkenhein--hated her from the bottom of my soul. Ah,
beloved! it hurts, hurts deeply, to see the glance of the man one loves
passing one over for another woman. Do you remember the night of
Kläre's birthday, when you sat in the Falkenheins' garden? I did not
exist for you. I could have knelt before you, begging and imploring,
'Can you not even see me here?' But you had eyes only for Mariechen,
and when I went away into the night, you and she were standing together
by the railing like a betrothed pair. Happiness shone in your eyes.
Yes! in yours too, dearest."
Reimers kissed the hand of his adored lady. "Forgive me!" he sobbed.
"Forgive me! darling, my poor darling! My eyes were drawn to follow
you; but I turned them by force to Mariechen. I know now that I loved
you alone even then. In dreams, and when half awake, when I let myself
go, it was you only for whom I longed. Dearest, forgive me!"
Hannah shook her head gently, and looked fondly into his petitioning
eyes.
"Be content," she whispered; "it was wrong of me, and I conquered it.
In the night, after I had seen you both like that, I fought it out
with myself. I recognised that it was hateful egoism that made me
grudge you your happiness, and that my love for you should be quite
otherwise--more unselfish. From thenceforth Marie Falkenhein became
dear to me; it was as though I were you,--I felt an involuntary
yearning towards her, warmer, apparently, than your own. I would have
liked to endow her with all that you found clever and charming in my
speech or actions; I would have given her all that remained to me of
beauty; above all, I longed to pour into her veins the fire of my own
great love, that you might be entirely happy and blest. I would have
decked your bride with my own hands, and have brought her to you; I
would have kept watch, that nothing profane should disturb your bliss."
Tenderly her arms encircled her lover's neck, and her words flowed
faster.
"Suddenly all this was changed, and I was not less so. I could not be
sad when I saw Mariechen's tear-stained eyes. I guessed that something
terrible had occurred; but I was groping in the dark till I got the
truth out of that good Andreae. Then I wept for grief that your
happiness was blighted; and I wept for joy that you were now wholly
mine. For you are mine?"
Reimers clasped her to him passionately; she nestled quivering in his
arms. Their lips met, and she whispered: "If chance had not led you to
me to-day--then I should have gone to you. I love you so."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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