'You were speaking of Jessie, mother.'
'Yes, my dear. I was about to say that Jessie has no one to look after
her but me.'
'And me,' I added proudly.
'And you, my dear. I know what your feelings are towards her, but you
are away at your work all the day, and then the duty devolves upon me
alone.'
'Well, mother?'
'Jessie is a little different to me from what she was; I am beginning
to think--sorely against my will, dear child--that she mistrusts me. I
know that she is not happy, but I could comfort her if she would let
me. It might be better for all of us if she would confide in me.'
'I am sure it would be, mother.'
'She does not repulse me, Chris; she avoids me. When I have it in my
mind to speak to her seriously, she seems to know what I am about to
say--she is very bright and clever, my dear--and she obstinately
refuses to listen; runs away, or turns me from my purpose by some
means. I am very anxious about her.'
'Jessie can take care of herself,' I said, assuming an easiness I did
not feel; she is not happy at home, as we know; but we know, also, who
is to blame for that. I suppose she refuses to listen to you because
she feels that the subject you wish to speak to her upon is a painful
one. I should do the same in her place.'
'I don't blame her, my dear; don't think that I blame her. But I must
not forget my duty. She has no mother; do not I stand in that relation
to her?'
I kissed my mother for these words.
'Then, knowing that I wish her nothing but good, why does she avoid me
so steadily? O Chris, my child! greater unhappiness than all may come
from her distrust of me.'
A tremor ran through my frame. Not love alone, but pity, was expressed
in my mother's face and tone.
'I don't quite understand you, mother,' I said.
'Where does Jessie go to in the day, my dear?'
'Where does Jessie go to in the day!' I repeated. 'Does she go
anywhere?'
'Then you do not know, my dear; she hides it from you as well. For the
last fortnight she has gone out every morning at eleven 'o'clock, and
has not returned until four. I have put her dinner by for her every
day, but she will not eat it, and she refuses to say where she has
been.'
I considered for a few moments, and soon arrived at a satisfactory
conclusion.
'It is very simple. She goes to Miss West's, and she does not eat her
dinner because she knows she is not welcome to it. It is uncle Bryan's
dinner, and this is uncle Bryan's house. Jessie is very proud.'
My mother shook her head. 'She does not go to Miss West's. I have not
watched her, because I know that she would discover me, and that it
would turn her more against me. But three mornings ago I saw her get
into an omnibus which goes to the West-end. What friends can she have
there, Chris? And if she has friends, should we not know who they
are?'
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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