'I know now,' he said softly, what will kill your mother if she dies.
It will shock you to hear it, and you must not think me cruel for
telling you. When your mother, in the night she was taken ill, cried
to you that her heart was almost broken, it was no mere phrase that
she uttered--it was a cry from her soul, and the words exactly
represented her condition. If she dies, it will be because her heart
_is_ broken. And you will have broken it. Ay,' he continued gently, as
I started in horror from him, 'and so would your mother start from me
if she had strength and sense to hear and understand. She would think
me the cruelest monster. But what I have said is true nevertheless.
Your mother's life has been bound up in yours. No woman, unsustained
by most perfect and most unselfish love, could have held up against
such trials as hers; where she has had doubts she has thrust them from
her, and her deep affection has given her strength to bear her
sufferings. For a long time there has been raging within her a mental
conflict, the torture of which only those can understand who love as
she loves, and only those can feel whose natures are as delicately
sensitive as hers. Even I, until now a stranger to her and to you, can
see the fire which has been consuming her gentle spirit. And when the
final blow came, and she was made to feel by your words that she had
wrecked your happiness and had lost your love (for she _must_ have
felt then what she had long feared), she sank beneath it. I have,
thank God, through all my life reverenced woman's character, but I
never reverenced it so thoroughly as I do now, after hearing your
story. You ask me if all hope is really gone, and if nothing can be
done? Well, I see a way. What can kill can cure. I warn you that the
chance is a slight one, but it must be tried. Can you afford to go
away from London for a time?'
'Yes, I have money saved; and I think I could arrange to take work
with me, and do it in the country.'
'That is well. If you will take your mother away from London, say to
the scenes with which you were familiar when you were a child, and
attend to her yourself, and make her feel and understand that you love
her as she deserves and yearns to be loved, she may recover. That is
the only chance. She is almost certain to have conscious intervals. If
you have tact enough to be alone with her, as you were in the old
days, when her consciousness first returns, it may prove the
turning-point towards convalescence. I cannot explain myself more
fully; I will give you a simple strengthening medicine with you, and
all necessary directions as to diet. When will you go?'
I arranged to go on the following day, and Josey West said that,
notwithstanding what the doctor had said, it was impossible that I
should go alone. Her sister Florry, who was nearly sixteen years of
age, should accompany us.
'If your mother asks who she is,' said Josey, 'you can say she is the
maid.'
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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