'Some feeling with regard to myself,' I continued, 'may prevent Jessie
from coming to you here, and I think it would be a good thing for you
to go to her. I know she loves you and would be glad to see you, and
you may be able to counsel and advise her. Turk West knows where she
lives, and, although he would not tell me if I asked him, I believe he
would tell you readily.'
'Do you think so, dear child?' she asked. 'Then I will go to him, and
tell him what you say.'
The voice is a great tell-tale, and I knew by the tune in which my
mother spoke that my suggestion had given her pleasure.
'There is no time like the present,' I said.
My mother rose immediately, and put on her bonnet.
'I shall leave off work at eight o'clock,' I said, so that she might
understand I did not wish her to hurry back, and then I shall go round
to Josey West for an hour.'
She nodded, and stood looking over my shoulder as I worked.
'If I see Jessie,' she said, and paused.
'Yes, mother, if you see her---- I hope you will see her.'
'I hope so too, dear child. Shall I give her any message from you?'
'Not unless she asks after me, mother; then you may give her my love.'
There was the merest trembling in my voice as I said this, but it was
sufficient to agitate my mother's soul. I laid my graver aside, and
said,
'You see how it is, mother; I cannot do or act otherwise. Jessie could
not know more about me and my feelings if I stood at her door all day
long. I never loved her more than I do now, and I believe I shall
never love her less; it would not be true if I said I was happy, but I
am far happier than I deserve to be. My mother is still left to me,
thank God!'
'Dear child! dear child!' she murmured, with tender caresses.
'And you must not think it strange, mother, if I don't ask you
questions when you come back. You will tell me whatever is worth
telling. Now, one other word, and then you must run away, for I have
work to finish. Should you meet with uncle Bryan----'
'Would you wish me to, my dear?' she asked wistfully.
'Yes,' I answered; I should like you to find him. If you do, give him
my love also, and say that I should like to come to see him, if he
will not come to us. And, remember, mother, if he wants for anything,
all that I have is his; but for him I should not have been in my
present position. As for the past, let bygones be bygones. As
Americans would say, I should be truly happy to shake hands with him
on that platform.'
My mother kissed me, and went out of the room. I thought she had
started on her errand, but she returned in a quarter of an hour, with
a bunch of wallflowers in her hand.
'I only came in to show you these, my dear,' she said; 'smell
them--they are very sweet. You have not studied the language of
flowers, have you, my dear?'
'No, mother.'
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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