What he should find to admire in me, who had certainly done nothing
to attract him, was beyond my power to imagine; but that did not
alter the very unpleasant fact that he _did_ regard me with favour,
for he made it too plain for there to be a doubt about the matter. I
shuddered to think that I must endure being made love to by a valet:
it was an odious and degrading idea. Had I realised the possibility
of it beforehand, I hardly knew whether I should ever have placed
myself where I should be exposed to the risk of anything so
disagreeable. Disgusted and angry at the admiration which I deemed an
insult, and was yet powerless to resent, I endeavoured to nip it in
the bud by energetic snubbing. Alas! he only thought that I was
affecting coyness in order to draw him on, and persisted in his
objectionable attentions all the more.
To add to my annoyance, I perceived that I was meanwhile incurring
the bitter enmity of Lady Mervyn's maid, Robinson, to whom Perkins
had, before my coming, devoted himself chiefly, and who strongly
objected to any transfer of his affections. Too much blinded by
jealousy to see how unwelcome his vulgar compliments were to me, she
attributed the fickle conduct of her swain entirely to my wiles, and
thought that I alone was to blame for his deserting her.
Unluckily the man had a smattering of French, and though his accent
was as bad as a Corsican's (which is saying a _great_ deal), he was
immensely proud of his acquirements as a linguist, and aired them on
every possible opportunity. Knowing that I, too, was supposed to be
accomplished in this line, he kept on addressing me in the one
foreign tongue which he believed himself to know, whenever he could
recollect enough of it to translate any remark that he wanted to
make. By this proceeding the flames of Robinson's wrath were
constantly being fanned higher and higher; for she--understanding
not a word of any language except her own--jumped to the conclusion
that whatever French observation he addressed to me must necessarily
be something of an extra-tender description, which would be unsuited
to the ears of the general public.
I--anxious not to quarrel with her, and recoiling with horror from
the idea that any one could possibly suspect me of having the
faintest approach to a private understanding with Perkins--invariably
answered his speeches in English. But my efforts to undeceive her
were in vain, and by the time we retired to bed she had begun to
express her hostility in various unmistakable ways--such as darting
angry glances in my direction, giving vent to frequent sniffs
betokening great mental irritation, and making half-audible
observations as to the rudeness of talking secrets in company, and
the intense objection she had to meddlesome strangers who intruded
and made mischief amongst friends.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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