But even this exalted effusion did not survive the first glow of
satisfaction, for although it was treasured up as too good to destroy,
and did not sound unlike the language that the Brothers and Sisters held
in the meeting-house, he could not remember ever seeing a letter thus
couched. It was succeeded by a homelier version, in which the word
“Epistle” stood out as the only connecting-link. With a composition
playing now for safety, and mainly monosyllabic, it would be a poor
diplomacy not to work in one high-class word, of whose spelling he was
sure.
“This Epistle is to say,” the new version began abruptly, “that we don’t
need you to call on Frydays——”
Good heavens! Even Friday was not to be found in the Bible. Pursuing
this astonishing line of investigation, he realized that Sunday itself
was absent from its pages. The Bible without Sunday! O incredible
discoveries of the illuminated!
He altered it, following Genesis, to the “sixth day,” but then came a
paralysing doubt whether it was not the fifth, for how could you rest on
Sunday if that was not the seventh? He casually remarked to his mother
that it was odd they did not rest on the seventh day, as commanded in
Genesis. She explained to him that Sunday was the Lord’s Day, but he
seemed dissatisfied with the argument. Perhaps Moses & Son were not so
wrong, he remarked, repenting of his resentment against them for being
closed that Saturday.
He woke up the next morning with the solution of dodging the mention of
the day and merely relieving Jinny of the duty of “markiting” for them.
He felt sure that this word could be found, remembering a text about two
sparrows being sold for a farthing. But to his chagrin it was not in the
“markit” that they were sold. In steeplechasing for the word, he tumbled
on a text in Hosea: “Blow ye the cornet in Gibeah, and the trumpet in
Ramah,” and that seemed like an omen. Yes, he _would_ blow it in
Bradmarsh, if not in Ramah. Let him wait till she came with the horn;
then after whelming her with the wonder of his execution, he could, face
to face and free of orthography, bid her trouble Frog Farm no more. And
the postscript of his great letter, “Let not your horn be exalted, nor
speak with a stiff neck,” rang through his mind again, like a prophetic
warning against overweening damsels.
“He’s come back a new soul,” Martha reported to Caleb, with shining
eyes. “He’s found God.”
Caleb shook his head sceptically. “He’s too boxed up for that—he don’t
open his heart enough.”
“But he opens the Bible,” urged Martha, “and he won’t close it even for
meals. I can never get it for myself nowadays.”
“Dedn’t you read me as the Devil can spout Scripture?” said Caleb
shrewdly.
“For shame, Caleb. Anybody can see how changed the boy is—the only
thing that makes me anxious is his Sabbatarian leanings. Suppose he
should go and join the Seventh-Day Baptists.”
“Dip hisself o’ Saturdays?”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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