However (he assured himself) it would come back to him in time. Indeed,
it was bound to. It wasn't the first time this sort of thing had
happened to him, nor yet the second: he was no raw novice to cry despair
over such an everyday set-back.
But what the devil _was_ the matter with him? All the way to Town he
had been full of his theme, as keen-set for work as a schoolboy for a
holiday, and hardly less for the well-worn comforts of his abode. And,
lo! here sat he with his head as empty as his hands, and that misfit
feeling badgering him to exasperation.
Instinctively he consulted a pipe and, through its atmosphere, the view
from his windows: the never-failing, tried and true, enheartening
monotony of that sun-scorched area of back-yards, grim and unlovely in
the happiest weather, cat-haunted and melancholy in all its phases....
But today he essayed vainly to distil from contemplation of it any of
the rare glamour of yesterday's zeal and faith. It was all gone, all!
and the erratic mind of him would persist in trailing off after errant
thoughts of Venetia Tankerville.
Surpassing inconsistency of the human heart! Three hours ago, in her
company, he had been able to control and to behave himself, to
anticipate with pleasure the prospect of returning to his desk after
escorting her from the Pennsylvania to the Grand Central Station and
putting her aboard the train for Greenwich, whither she was bound for a
fortnight's visit. But now--he could think of nothing but Venetia:
Venetia's eyes, her scarlet lips, her exquisite hands, her hair of
bronze; her moods and whims, her laughter and her pensiveness, alike
adorable; Venetia in evening dress on the moon-drenched terrace of
Tanglewood; Venetia on the tennis-courts, all in white, glorified by
sunlight, an amazingly spirited, victorious figure; Venetia with her
hair blown across her eyes, at the wheel of one of Tankerville's racing
motor-craft; Venetia in the gloom of the Grand Central Station,
lingering to say good-bye to her betrothed....
It required several days for this stupid gentleman to awaken to the fact
that the name of his trouble was merely love; that an acknowledged lover
is a person vastly different from a diffident and distant worshipper;
that, in short, the muse of the creative fancy is a jealous mistress,
prone to sulk and deny the light of her countenance to a suitor who
thinks to share his addresses with another.
But this illuminating discovery did little to allay his discontent:
progress with his work alone could accomplish that; and the work dragged
dolefully; he scored only dismal failures in his efforts to produce
something to satisfy himself. And he had only six months to prove his
worth. The date of their marriage had been fixed for February; every
detail of their plans had been worked out under the masterful guidance
of Helena; even the steamer upon which they were to sail for Egypt had
been selected and their suite reserved.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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