As soon as they had seated themselves the Major said--Though the sudden exit of this wretched man naturally takes up your thoughts, and must also occupy my attention, yet I seize a few minutes, my dear John, to inform you of something that has passed between Mr. Devereux and me this morning; and I am persuaded you will pardon the intrusion, though it is a matter, that relates entirely to myself. I had not long parted from that gentleman, when I met you, and his business with me was to request, that I would change my quarters, and accept of the accommodation of his house, whilst you and Edward took up your abode with him. When I declined this polite invitation on the plea of regimental duties, his kindness led him to urge it upon me with a degree of earnestness, that seemed very particular, and embarrassed me not a little; for in fact I had more reasons for withstanding his importunity than were convenient for me to disclose to him. To you, my dear John, I can tell all the truth, and the truth is, that like a silly puppy as I am, I have something more than a weak side towards his fair daughter, and don’t choose to expose my folly in either his or her company. You must know, my friend, that yesterday was not the first time of my seeing her. In a situation of some danger from an unruly horse at a review, it was my fortune to be of service to her; by which adventure I dislocated my wrist, and have felt a pain in a certain part under my left ribs ever since: It occurred to me that her father had been let into the secret of this piece of service, on my part, and was seeking an opportunity for making me some sort of return, which you can well believe I am too proud to allow of; besides which-- Besides what? said John (availing himself of a pause in the Major’s narrative) can’t you go on with your story, and fairly own that you are not one whit more in love with Maria Devereux than Maria Devereux is with you? do you suppose that I have no eyes, no observation to discover that? Nonsense! rejoined the Major, you allude to what occurred upon our meeting yesterday, and mistake gratitude for liking. Now gratitude, you know, won’t serve her purpose, for I want no return; and love would make an ass and a fool of me, were I to let it get the mastery of me; for what am I? ’Twould be just as possible to persuade his faithful majesty to give me the princess of Portugal to wife, as to propose my ridiculous self, (Major Wilson forsooth, with a sword by his side and a bit of ribband in his hat) to a man of Devereux’s sort, whose coffers overflow with the gold of Brazil, and whose daughter is a rock of diamonds, eclipsed indeed by the lustre of her eyes, and the bright display of ten thousand thousand charms, which I am not quite philosopher enough to withstand, nor fool enough to encounter? Why, John, if I could suppose for a moment that she had any liking for me, s’death! I should run crazy, nay, I know not where I should run.--