“Ay, but interest is of no professional use,” returned the doctor,
sniffing up a huge pinch of snuff. “We look to results in our calling.
I must say I should like to have been able to tell Mr. Sherman when I
get back that I left you remembering everything. Eh, now? But I don’t
believe there’s a medical man living who ever encountered such a case
as yours. So much density of mental gloom, sir, seems psychologically
impossible. If you could only have given me one end of the thread, so
to speak, I might have drawn the whole skein out smooth. Look about you
now. Here is genuine Thames scenery, which, if you are an Englishman,
ought to go home straight to your heart and recall a thousand matters.”
Holdsworth stared around him, puzzling and biting his lip.
“I have often felt, and I feel now,” he exclaimed, “that if I could
see something which was prominently identified with my past my memory
would return. When we were off Margate, I grew breathless--breathless,
doctor, believe me, under the shock of an indefinable sensation. I made
sure that my memory was about to rush upon me--oh! it is impossible to
explain what is inexplicable to myself. But there have been moments,
since we first entered the river, when I have felt that a revelation
was close at hand--and I have trembled whilst awaiting the flooding in
of memory, which will not come--which _will_ not come!”
“It _will_ come. The power that you possess to remember the names and
qualities of things which you see, has long ago persuaded me that
your memory is not dead, but torpid. Keep your body up, when you get
ashore, with nourishing food. Walk the streets constantly and use your
eyes, and, when a recollection rises to the surface, don’t rush upon
it voraciously, but leave it to its own will. Consider, memories are
nothing but shadows; you can’t dodge and drive them into corners ...”
Here somebody called to him, on which the little man shook Holdsworth’s
hand, and darted towards the group of passengers.
The ship was rapidly nearing Gravesend, where she would disembark her
passengers. The Thames looked noble, with many vessels of all shapes
and sizes breaking its shining waters, with the houses and wharves
ashore, with here and there a short wooden pier running into the
stream, and the green summer country smiling beyond.
It was a bright July morning, and the air had an exquisite transparency
that so clarified and sharpened the outlines of objects, that it was
like looking at them through highly-polished glass. Just such a day
should greet all homeward-sailing ships, and make their inmates merry
with a foretaste of the shore-life they are to enjoy after their long
strife with the distant treacherous ocean.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Elsewhere in the archive
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account