“Her society gives me great happiness,” he replied, with the faintest
tremor in his tone.
It might have been that sign of agitation which made her look at him
suddenly.
His gaze sank. But he felt her eyes upon his face, and the eager,
restless scrutiny that filled them.
But if ever a memory of something infinitely beloved to her had been
renewed by his reply, it melted upon her conviction of the death of him
whom Holdsworth’s voice had recalled to her, as snow upon water.
Could it have been otherwise?
Not five years--not twenty years--not a lifetime, maybe, of ordinary
sufferings could have so transformed his face but that her love could
have pierced the mask.
But the unnatural misery of those ten days in the open boat--the hunger
that had wasted, the agonising thirst that had twisted his face out of
all likeness to what it had been, the growth of beard and moustache
that hid the lower part of the countenance, the gray hair, the bare
forehead, the deformed eyebrows, the rugged indent between the brows,
the stooped form!--
Here was a transformation that would have defied a mother’s
instincts--that would have offered an impenetrable front to perception
barbed into keenness by the profoundest love that ever warmed the heart.
And yet, looking at this woman attentively--looking at her gazing at
yonder man, cowering, it might almost seem, in the friendly shadow
of the wall--there was something in her eyes, something in her face,
something in her whole manner, that would have quickened your pulse
with a moment of breathless suspense.
In such matters, as in the loss of memory, we must recognise the
existence of a deep spiritual insight having no reference to the
revelations of the mind. There are convictions which do not satisfy,
though cemented by logic and acted on by their possessor with sincere
conscience. Against such convictions instincts will surge as waves
break upon a shore. Echoes are awakened, but are thought purposeless.
And the conviction is still maintained, while the secret truth rolls at
its base.
The voice of Holdsworth, but not his face, had set Dolly’s instincts in
motion.
But then her conviction that Holdsworth was dead was a permanent one;
and under it her instincts subsided into uneasy sleep, though there was
a shadow of melancholy on her face when she removed her eyes, which had
not been there before Holdsworth spoke.
“I hope Nelly has been good, Mr. Hampden.”
“Very good, indeed.”
He seemed to know that the crisis was passed, for he breathed more
freely, looked at her, and removed his hand from the chair.
“These toys are very beautiful. I really feel unable to express my
gratitude to you.”
“You owe me no thanks. My gratitude is due to you for allowing your
sweet little girl to come and see me.”
“Mrs. Parrot tells me you are very fond of children?”
“Very. I hope little Nelly will often be here. I am quite alone, and
she cheers me with her pretty prattle.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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