His words smote him as the idlest mockery; but apart from his mental
sufferings, the mere effort of raising his voice pained him intensely.
He put the child down, forcing a smile which seemed no better than a
grin of pain upon his emaciated face, and then stood up to sweep the
horizon, but soon sank down again with a sound as of a clanging of
bells in his ears, and his throat constricted and burning with a dry,
feverish heat, the pain of which was exquisite.
He was now sensible that his memory was going, for in trying to think
of the child’s name he found that he could not recall it. But this,
somehow, gave him no concern, for his whole physical being was in
perfect accord with such lapses of the intellectual faculties, and the
discovery bred not the lightest movement of surprise or apprehension in
his mind.
At noon, Johnson asked for more rum, and Holdsworth measured out a
small quantity for the three of them, diluting the draught, as he had
before done, with a few drops of salt water.
The boy never moved from the seat where he had been placed by
Holdsworth; he knew not, in reality, where his mother had gone, but
there was plainly a suspicion in him that she was in the sea, and he
kept his eyes fixed on the water, as though in expectation of her
rising at the side of the boat. He shed no more tears; indeed, physical
weakness had so far conquered him, that it had rendered him incapable
of tears. The sight of his white, young, piteous face, his head moving
on his shoulders in convulsive jerks, and his helpless down-hanging
arms, was enough to make one pray to God that death might remove him
speedily, if the term of horrible misery were not to be ended at once.
The afternoon passed, and the sun went down behind a calm sea. While
the crimson flush still lived in the sky, a flock of sea birds came
from the south, and hovered awhile over the boat, as though irresolute
to quit it for their further destination. They were at too great an
elevation to enable the men to judge what birds they were; but they
emitted harsh sounds, resembling in some measure the cry of gulls,
mixed with the rough intonation of rooks. After this pause, they
pursued their flight, and soon winged themselves out of view, but not
without leaving behind them a species of desolate hope, such as would
be excited in the minds of men who had been long banished from the
sight of living things, and by whom the most trivial incident would be
interpreted as an auspicious omen.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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