After an instant the manner of the two young men became more serious,
and March showed a yellow paper--"a telegram," thought their on-looker.
"He's coming here, no doubt; possibly to tell me its news; more likely
just to say good-by again; but certainly with nothing--nothing--O
nothing! to ask." For a moment her hand pressed hard against her lips,
and then her maiden self-regard quietly but strenuously definitely
rebelled.
The telegram seemed to bring its readers grave disappointment. March
made indignant gestures in obvious allusion to distant absentees. Now
they began to move apart; Fair stepped farther away, March drew nearer
the house, still making gestures as if he might be saying--Barbara
resentfully guessed----
"You might walk slow; I shan't stop more than a minute!"
She left the window with silent speed, saying, in her heart, "You
needn't! You shan't!"
As March with clouded brow was lifting his hand toward a tortuous brass
knocker the door opened and Barbara, carrying a book and pencil in one
hand, while the other held down her hat-brim, tripped across the
doorstep.
The cloud vanished. "Miss Barb--good-morning!"
"O!--Mr.--March." Her manner so lacked both surprise and pleasure that
he colored. He had counted on a sweet Southern handshake, but she kept
hold of the hat-brim, let her dry smile of inquiry fade into a formal
deference, and took comfort in his disconcertion.
"I was just coming," he said, "I--thought you'd let me come back just to
say good-by--but I see you're on your way to a recitation--I--"
Her smile was cruel. "Why, my recitations are not so serious as that,"
she drawled. "Just to say good-by ought not to con-sti-tute any
se-ri-ous de-ten-tion."
John's heart sank like a stone. Scarcely could he believe his senses.
Yet this was she; that new queen of his ambitions whose heavenly
friendship had lifted first love--boy love--from its grave and clad it
in the shining white of humility and abnegation to worship her sweet
dignity, purity, and tenderness, asking for nothing, not even for hope,
in return. This was she who at every new encounter had opened to him a
higher revelation of woman's worth and loveliness than the world had
ever shown him; she to whom he had been writing letters half last night
and all this morning, tearing each to bits before he had finished it
because he could see no life ahead which an unselfish love could ask her
to live, and as he rent the result of each fresh effort hearing the
voice of his father saying to him as in childhood days, "I'd be proud
faw you to have the kitt'n, son, but, you know, she wouldn't suit yo'
dear motheh's high-strung natu'e. You couldn't ever be happy with
anything that was a constant tawment to her, could you?"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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