"Who, me? Lord, yes! The finest girl I know is that way--dances Spanish dances--alone with other girls, of course. The church folks raised Cain about it once. O I--you think I mean Miss Halliday--well I do. Miss Garnet can tease me about her all she likes--ha, ha! it doesn't faze me! Miss Fannie's nothing to me but a dear friend--never was! Why, she's older than I am--h-though h-you'd never suspect it." "Well, yes, I think I should have known it." "O go 'long! Somebody told you! But I swear, Mr. Fair, I wonder, sir, you're not more struck with Miss Halliday. Now, I go in for mind and heart. I don't give a continental for externals; and yet--did you ever see such glorious eyes as Fan--Miss Halliday's? Now, honest Ingin! _did_ you, _ever_?" Mr. Fair admitted that Miss Halliday's eyes danced. "You say they do? You're right! Hah! _they_ dance Spanish dances. I've seen black eyes that went through you like a sword; I've seen blue eyes that drilled through you like an auger; and I've seen gray ones that bit through you like a cold-chisel; and I've seen--now, there's Miss Garnet's, that just see through you without going through you at all--O I don't like any of 'em! but Fannie Halliday's eyes--Miss Fannie, I should say--they seem to say, 'Come out o' that. I'm not looking at all, but I know you're there!' O sir!--Mr. Fair, don't you hate, sir, to see such a creature as that get married to anybody? I say, to _anybody_! I tell you what it's like, Mr. Fair. It's like chloroforming a butterfly, sir! That's what it's like!" He meditated and presently resumed--"But, Law' no! She's nothing to me. I've got too much to think of with these lands on my hands. D'you know, sir, I really speak more freely to you than if you belonged here and knew me better? And I confess to you that a girl like F--Miss Halliday--would be enough to keep me from ever marrying!" "Why, how is that?" "Why? O well, because!--knowing her, I couldn't ever be content with less, and, of course, I couldn't get her or make her happy if I got her. Torture for one's better than torture for two. Mind, that's a long ways from saying I ever did want her, or ever will. I'm happy as I am--confirmed bachelor--ha-ha-ha! What I do want, Mr. Fair, sir, is to colonize these lands, and to tell you the truth, sir--h--I don't know how to do it!" "Are your titles good?" "Perfect." "Are the lands free from mortgage?" "Free! ha-ha! they'd be free from mortgage, sir, but for one thing." "What's that?" "Why, they're mortgaged till you can't rest! The mortgages ain't so mortal much, but they've been on so long we'd almost be afraid to take them off. They're dried on sir!--grown in! Why, sir, we've paid more interest than the mortgages foot up, sir!" "What were they made for? improvements?" "Impr--O yes, sir; most of 'em were given to improve the interior of our smoke-house--sort o' decorate it with meat." "Ah, you wasted your substance in riotous living!"