John had pushed away his plate, and left all its homely charm, for Aunt Clara's words had choked him with crowding memories. He sat still for some time, with his head in his hands. Aunt Clara watched him as she rocked back and forth, and wondered if she had for once been at fault. After a time, however, he raised his head and said, with an effort at lightness: "I am not much of a fellow, Aunt Clara. Sometimes I do feel a bit lonely, and although I have enjoyed my mission, the thought of my homecoming has been a lonely one, except for you, Aunt Clara." "Well, of course you are lonesome, John, and that's why I want you, now that you are home from your mission, to get married, and have some comfort in life." His head was drooped again, between his hands, and he said slowly: "Aunt Clara, I have been a selfish one-idea fellow in my life. I deserve all your reproach and my own loneliness." "Now, John, I want you to tell me just what you mean. You have something in your mind which needs airing. What is it?" "I mean that from my earliest youth I have loved, with all the strength of my heart, a girl who never has and never will, I fear, care anything for me. For some years I felt that I could win her, through prayer and faith, and I hoped and was happy. But I did not succeed. I have tried to hide my feelings, though, and I don't think anyone has suspected me, unless it was the girl herself, occasionally." "John, there is a belongingness in love as in life. We are not married by chance. I firmly believe that each has made covenant with his mate in the life before this. If that girl belongs to you, you will get her. If not, you don't want her. Who is it?" "It is Dian." He spoke with an effort, as if it were painful thus to speak her name. "Oh!" Aunt Clara was not much surprised. "What about Ellie?" she asked. "I loved Ellen, but it was not as I love Dian. Maybe I have so set my heart all my life upon getting Dian that I did not give myself a chance to see other girls. Aunt Clara, forget that I have ever said what I am about to say; but I had a feeling that Ellen liked me. And I have felt all the remorse natural that I did not save her while I could." "We can always see where we could do better, even in small things. But no one need destroy all hopes of eternity because love is not returned or because a loved one dies. This love plays such mischief, when it is not understood and governed!" "Just so. I have failed to conquer my love, and it leaves me sore with defeat." "Why should you conquer your love? Have you ever asked Dian to have you? Diantha is a noble girl; she is always so strong, so sweet, and so good." "Don't I know it?" almost groaned John, as he pressed his hands across his eyes.