The unspoken words rended him to the soul; he was enveloped in a
despairing darkness. But a greater terror than all fell upon him when
he thought of Dan. In such a momentous crisis as that through which
Joshua's mind was passing, nothing of the past is unremembered. Words
which otherwise are borne in mind only by their sense come back as if
they were just being, uttered. When Dan had imparted to Joshua the
secret of his love for Minnie, he had said, "A great hope, shadowed by
a great fear, has entered my soul; a hope which, fulfilled, would make
earth heaven for me. Is it too precious a thing to pray for? It seems
so to me. I tremble as I think of it. But if it is not to be, I hope I
shall soon die." And Joshua heard again that cry from Dan's soul,
almost word for word. The sacred nature of the love existing between
Dan and Joshua needs to be understood to realize the terrible fear
that smote Joshua at the present time. If Dan should ever come to
believe him false, he would not wish to live: for the salt would have
gone out of his life forever.
For full a quarter of an hour Joshua was wrapped in painful thought;
and the Old Sailor had not disturbed him. But now, as he raised his
tearful eyes to the Old Sailor's face, the Old Sailor laid his hand
gently upon Joshua's knee, and said,--
"Well, Joshua, and how do you make it out?"
"As bad as it well can be, sir. This is the hardest stroke I have ever
had. I do not think that even you can understand how hard it is for
me."
"Because of Dan?"
"Because of Dan, sir. I have no need to hide Dan's secret from you
now--you know it; but if Dan should be disappointed in his love for
Minnie, I don't know what effect it would have upon him. All this is
very terrible. I don't need to assure you, sir, that I have been
entirely blameless, and that I have never treated Minnie in any way
but that of an honored sister."
"You do not, my lad," said the Old Sailor, with an evident brightening
up in his manner; "I am satisfied of that. But what do we do when a
storm comes? Do we run and bury our heads in our hammocks, or do we
stand up like men to meet it and battle with it?--as we are going to
meet this storm, which has come upon us unaware, and from no fault of
our'n. Like men, Josh; we're going to meet it like men. I am looking
it straight in the face. No wonder it made you stagger when it come
upon you sudden. It set my old head a-thinking when I found it
out--though it only come upon me by degrees, and after a deal of
watching. Just you think a bit now, Josh, and tell me if you don't see
any way of getting the ship off the rocks."
"I can see no way, sir," said Joshua, after a little anxious
pondering; "all is dark around me."
The Old Sailor laughed a quiet little laugh.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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