"Oh, miss," said the woman, dropping her gossip, and returning to her
gratitude (which was genuine)--"oh, miss, mayn't I know your name? I
want to put it in me prayers. There was just three cents in the house,
miss, when you came; and Lyddy she couldn't eat the last meal I got for
her--a cracker and a piece of mackerel."
"You can pray for me without a name," said Eve, going out.
She felt as though there were hot coals in her throat, she could
scarcely breathe. She went towards the forest, and, entering it by a
cart-track, walked rapidly on. Rose Bonham was the daughter of the
butter-woman. Bonham had a forest farm about five miles from Port aux
Pins on the road to Betsy Lake, and his wife kept Paul's cottage
supplied with butter. Eve had seen the daughter several times; she was a
very beautiful girl. Eve and Cicely thought her bold; but the women who
eat the butter are apt to think so of those who bring it, if the
bringers have sparkling eyes, peach-like complexions, and the gait of
Hebe.
And Paul himself had suggested the spending the night there--an entirely
unnecessary thing--under the pretence of gaining thereby an earlier
start in the morning.
She came to a little pool of clear water; pausing beside it, half
unconsciously, she beheld the reflection of her face in its mirror, and
something seemed to say to her, "What is your education, your culture,
your senseless pride worth, when compared with the peach-like bloom of
that young girl?" Her own image looked up at her, pale, cold, and stern;
it did not seem to her to have a trace of beauty. She took a stone, and,
casting it in the pool, shattered the picture. "I wish I were beautiful
beyond words! I _could_ be beautiful if I had everything; if nothing but
the finest lace ever touched me, if I never raised my hand to do
anything for myself, if I had only dainty and delicate and beautiful
things about me, I should be beautiful--I know I should. Bad women have
those things, they say; why haven't they the best of it?"
She began to walk on again. She had not given much thought to the
direction her steps were taking; now it came to her that the road to
Lake Betsy, and therefore to Bonham's, was not far away, and she crossed
the wood towards it. When she reached it, she turned towards Bonham's.
Five miles. It was now after five o'clock.
When she came in sight of the low roof and scattered out-buildings a
sudden realization of what she was doing came to her, and she stopped.
Why was she there? If they should see her, any of them, what would they
think? What could she say? As though they were already upon her, she
took refuge hastily behind the high bushes with which the road was
bordered. "Oh, what have I come here for? Humiliating! Let me get back
home!--let me get back home!" She returned towards Port aux Pins by the
fields, avoiding the road; the shadows were dense now; it was almost
night.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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