Ladies and GentlemenCobb, Irvin S. (Irvin Shrewsbury)
General
Ladies and Gentlemen
Cobb, Irvin S. (Irvin Shrewsbury)
Fiction; Short stories, American
"I have just corrupted the noble soul of the only truly unselfish
individual we have met to date in these mountains. I might add that
corruption comes high hereabouts. City prices prevail." He took her in
his arms and kissed her. "Let us now give thanks for deliverance from
a great peril. We ought to do more than just give thanks. How about a
little Christmas gift from each to the other?"
"But we decided that this year we'd spend that money up here." She
winced.
"Circumstances warrant a redecision. Besides, I'm thinking of useful
presents--presents which will bring joy to both of us. A couple of
those lovely light green railroad tickets back to New York! You give me
one; I'll give you one."
"Oh, Clem!" She hugged him.
"Oh, Felice!" He hugged her. "Where's that time-table? I saw a folder
around here the other day. If we caught a morning train out of the
junction tomorrow we might get in in time for the Baxters' party
tomorrow night. Everybody we know--and like--will be there."
"But you know it's a costume party--fancy dress. And we haven't any
costumes."
Airily he gestured away her quavering objections. "Say, do you know one
thing?" he said. "This place is incomplete. It needs a motto. If I had
time to spare I'd write one out and stick it up as a souvenir of our
visit. I'd write on it the words 'E Pluribus Your'n,' meaning: 'It's
all for you, dear Rousseau, the Bugbees have had enough.'... Now then,
if I could just find that time card? Oh, there it is, yonder behind
the clock. We can put in the rest of the night packing, and bright and
early tomor--"
He broke off, listening. From without came the advancing sound of
slushy foot-treads in a considerable number.
The tramping drew nearer and ended just outside. Masculine voices were
uplifted in song:
"Hark-k, the herald angels sing,
Glor-y to the--"
"That ain't right--wrong key!" they heard a dominating voice cutting in
to check the vocal flow. "Git set fur a fresh start."
"My Christmas minstrels," said Mrs. Bugbee.
"Our little band of strikers," murmured Mr. Bugbee. He hurried to the
mantel, plucked something from it, then leaped nimbly thence to a front
window and crouched behind its curtains, his posture tense. "Here's
where I also join the last-straw club," said Mr. Bugbee softly to
nobody in particular.
Once again the unseen troubadours essayed the opening measures of their
serenade:
"Hark-k the herald angels sing,
Glor-y to the new-born king,
Peace on earth--"
Mr. Bugbee snatched a sash up and made a movement as of hurling a
heavy object into the drizzling night. It was a heavy object, too,
judging by the yelp of pain which followed its outward flight. "I'll
peace-on-earth you!" he said, closing the window.
A confusion of noises betokening a retreat died away in the distance.
"Did you throw something?" asked Mrs. Bugbee.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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