England -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction; Love stories; Oxford (England) -- Fiction; Young women -- Fiction
“How mean!—how ungenerous!” Her agitation would hardly let her speak
coherently. “When we were riding, you ordered me—yes, it was
practically that!—you warned me, in a manner that nobody—_nobody_ —has
any right to use with me—unless he were my fiancé or my husband—that I
was not to dance with Otto Radowitz—I was not to see so much of Mr.
Sorell. So just to show you that I was really not at your beck and
call—that you could not do exactly what you liked with me—I danced with
Mr. Radowitz last night, and I refused to dance with you. Oh, yes, I
know I was foolish—I daresay I was in a temper too—but how you can make
that any excuse for your attack on that poor boy—how you can make me
responsible, if—”
Her voice failed her. But Falloden saw that he had won some advantage,
and he pushed on.
“I only want to point out that a man is not exactly a stock or a stone
to be played with as you played with me last night. Those things are
dangerous! Can you deny—that you have given me some reason to
hope—since we met again—to hope confidently, that you might change your
mind? Would you have let me arrange those rides for you—unknown to your
friends—would you have met me in the woods, those heavenly times—would
you have danced with me as you did—would you have let me pay you in
public every sort of attention that a man can pay to a girl, when he
wants to marry her, the night of the Marmion ball—if you had not felt
something for me—if you had not meant to give me a little hope—to keep
the thing at least uncertain? No!—if this business does turn out badly,
I shall have remorse enough, God knows—but you can’t escape! If you
punish me for it, if I alone am to pay the penalty, it will be not only
Radowitz that has a grievance—not only Radowitz whose life will have
been spoilt!”
She turned to him—hypnotised, subdued, by the note of fierce
accusation—by that self-pity of the egotist—which looked out upon her
from the young man’s pale face and tense bearing.
“No”—she said trembling—“no—it is quite true—I have treated you badly.
I have behaved wilfully and foolishly. But that was no reason—no
excuse—”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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