England -- Social life and customs -- 20th century -- Fiction; Mate selection -- Fiction; Young women -- Fiction
"I don’t think I quite understand the bishop," said Bob, as he left the
dignitary of the Church stranded long miles from anywhere. "He looked
very queer. But I suppose they’re made bishops because they are queer,
unless it’s on account of their legs. I can understand the gaiters, but
the apron licks me. I’ll ask him about it some day. But I wonder where
we are, and how much longer Geordie will go on. It’s luck I’ve had no
puncture and no breakdown. I thought it was all up when I sent that dog
over the hedge. He did fly. I wonder whether any bobbies have spotted
my number. I don’t care. Gordon owes me a lot of money by now. What’s
thirty-two times two thousand odd? Oh, I can’t remember. I’m getting
rather tired."
But he stuck to Geordie like a burr to a sheep, and between the two of
them they stirred up more ancient peace and the haunts of it than any
other two cars in the United Kingdom. They fairly bounded through
sleepy old Boston, and a policeman, waked up from sleep by Geordie, was
wide-awake enough by the time Bob came through to call on him to stop.
"I wouldn’t stop for an army of policemen," said Bob, recklessly. "I
don’t care. I’ll catch Geordie if I die for it. Gordon will pay my
fines. I wonder how the bishop is. This is the Spilsby road, is it? I
wonder whether Pen’s at Spilsby? Will she be very cross with me? Oh,
that was a hen! I _do_ think hens shouldn’t be allowed in a road."
A dog stood in the middle of the way and barked. In the middle of his
second bark, the front wheel caught him. He ended his bark in the
ditch, and was very dreamy about the whole affair for some time
afterward.
"That was a dog," said Bob. "I _do_ think dogs shouldn’t be allowed in
a road."
He missed a horse by a hairbreadth a mile farther on, and felt very
cross. He said horses shouldn’t be allowed in a road. He said the same
of carts and of a carriage, of children and agricultural labourers.
They were so slow. For now Geordie was going pretty fast, and Bob had
to go on the fourth speed, which is highly illegal and wicked and very
dangerous. He had never enjoyed himself so much before, and he was
undoubtedly the happiest boy in the three kingdoms.
"Geordie doesn’t know I’m after him," he said. "I’ll bet he’s riding
along easy. That car of Pen’s can go like lightning if he lets her out.
He will be mad when I come up."
And suddenly he perceived down a long, white road that Geordie was going
more slowly.
"This must be Spilsby," said Bob. He saw Geordie’s dust go off at a
right angle toward the right.
"I’ve done it," said the exultant boy. "We must be near Pen’s now."
For to turn to the right in the neighbourhood of Spilsby means to go
toward the North Sea.
Bob ran into Spilsby quite meekly on the second speed, and turned after
Geordie. A mile farther on, Bob saw a house in some trees, and all of a
sudden there was no more dust from Geordie’s car. Bob pulled up in the
middle of the road.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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