As she went up-stairs to her little room her heart reproached her. In
their interview the old man had shown great sweetness of feeling, a
delicate and remorseful tenderness, hardly to have been looked for in a
being so fantastic and self-willed. The shock of their conversation had
deepened the lines in a face upon which age had at last begun to make
those marks which are not another beauty, but the end of beauty. When
she had opened the door for him in the dusk, Julie had longed, indeed,
to go with him and soothe his solitary evening. His unmarried son,
William, lived with him intermittently; but his wife was dead. Lady
Blanche seldom came to town, and, for the most part, he lived alone in
the fine house in St. James's Square, of which she had heard her
mother talk.
He liked her--had liked her from the first. How natural that she should
tend and brighten his old age--how natural, and how impossible! He was
not the man to brave the difficulties and discomforts inseparable from
the sudden appearance of an illegitimate granddaughter in his household,
and if he had been, Julie, in her fierce, new-born independence, would
have shrunk from such a step. But she had been drawn to him; her heart
had yearned to her kindred.
No; neither love nor kindred were for her. As she entered the little,
bare room over the doorway, which she had begun to fill with books and
papers, and all the signs of the literary trade, she miserably bid
herself be content with what was easily and certainly within her grasp.
The world was pleased to say that she had a remarkable social talent.
Let her give her mind to the fight with Lady Henry, and prove whether,
after all, the salon could not be acclimatized on English soil. She had
the literary instinct and aptitude, and she must earn money. She looked
at her half-written article, and sighed to her books to save her.
That evening Thérèse, who adored her, watched her with a wistful and
stealthy affection. Her idol was strangely sad and pale. But she asked
no questions. All she could do was to hover about "mademoiselle" with
soft, flattering services, till mademoiselle went to bed, and then to
lie awake herself, quietly waiting till all sounds in the room opposite
had died away, and she might comfort her dumb and timid devotion with
the hope that Julie slept.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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