"Yes, I will; even if it does no good, it must come out. Dear lady,
I--I saw it with my own eyes. I saw how the stone from my father's hand
hit Vetturi; and Vetturi no more picked up a stone than that picture on
the wall picks up one. Then my father went and denied everything; and
caused all the witnesses and the whole court to lie. O heavens! What
have I said?"
"Be quiet. So you think then your father should have confessed?"
"Certainly, right out. I would have gone to our Grand Duke and kneeled
before him; but justice would have been done. 'I did not mean to kill
him, I did it in anger,'--that is honest and brings one to honor again.
How often has my father spoken in anger and derision of this one and
that one who pretends to be richer than he is and deceives people for
money--for money! And what good has it done my father? He must beg from
the lowest, for a good word or even for silence. Madam Pfann! last year
on Whitsunday I was with my father at St. Blasius. There was a woman
there who had painted her cheeks red, and put flour on her neck and
forehead. There she sat, in broad daylight, and looked boldly at
people, to see if they saw her beautiful red cheeks and white neck,
while she herself knew that she was not young, but on the contrary, old
and wrinkled."
"I understand. You think it is unworthy of your father."
"Unworthy?" repeated Thoma, for this expression, from a higher sphere
of thought, affected her strangely; and the judge's wife continued:
"Child, your thoughts at first were not so hard, but by degrees they
have grown sharper, have become bitterer and more poignant; and that
which should have softened you only made you more harsh. When your
father was humble it revolted you, and when he was proud, likewise."
Thoma's eyes grew larger and larger. She was like a patient whom the
physician tells exactly how he feels; and this amazement at another's
knowledge becomes a preparation for, and the commencement of a cure.
The judge's wife laid a hand on her shoulder.
"Dear Thoma, in imprisonment a man can only do no evil; but at liberty
he can do good. My child, your love of truth is good, beautiful, and
excellent, but--how shall I say it?--it is not in place now----"
The good lady was sensible of a deep embarrassment, and her face
reddened as though with shame. She, who was always urging
straightforwardness, should she now shake this girl's strict truth?
But she recovered herself, and continued: "If your father did deny the
truth, he is suffering a heavy punishment, because you also deny it."
"I?"
"Yes. You disown your child's heart. Don't tremble. You need not
promise me anything, except that you will once again examine yourself
earnestly and conscientiously. And your doing so will show itself in
the matter for which in reality I sent for you. My brother may soon
come, and I must arrange this with you quickly."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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