Last Words: A Final Collection of StoriesEwing, Juliana Horatia
General
Last Words: A Final Collection of Stories
Ewing, Juliana Horatia
Children's stories; Conduct of life -- Juvenile fiction
"Well, we forgot," said Polly. "We don't mean anything, you know. But
never mind that now, please. Tell us about our tongues. What is going
to happen to them?"
"I'm very much afraid," said the hot-tempered gentleman, in solemn,
measured tones, "that you are both of you--fast--going--to--the."
"Dogs?" suggested Harry, who was learned in cant expressions.
"Dogs!" said the hot-tempered gentleman, driving his hands through his
hair. "Bless your life, no! Nothing half so pleasant! (That is, unless
all dogs were like Snap, which mercifully they are not.) No, my sad
fear is, that you are both of you--rapidly--going--_to the
Snap-Dragons_!"
And not another word would the hot-tempered gentleman say on the
subject.
CHRISTMAS EVE.
In the course of a few hours Mr. and Mrs. Skratdj recovered their
equanimity. The punch was brewed in a jug, and tasted quite as good as
usual. The evening was very lively. There were a Christmas tree, Yule
cakes, log, and candles, furmety, and snap-dragon after supper. When
the company was tired of the tree, and had gained an appetite by the
hard exercise of stretching to high branches, blowing out "dangerous"
tapers, and cutting ribbon and pack-thread in all directions, supper
came, with its welcome cakes and furmety and punch. And when furmety
somewhat palled upon the taste (and it must be admitted to boast more
sentiment than flavor as a Christmas dish), the Yule candles were
blown out and both the spirits and the palates of the party were
stimulated by the mysterious and pungent pleasures of snap-dragon.
Then, as the hot-tempered gentleman warmed his coat-tails at the
Yule-log, a grim smile stole over his features as he listened to the
sounds in the room. In the darkness the blue flames leaped and danced,
the raisins were snapped and snatched from hand to hand, scattering
fragments of flame hither and thither. The children shouted as the
fiery sweetmeats burnt away the mawkish taste of the furmety. Mr.
Skratdj cried that they were spoiling the carpet; Mrs. Skratdj
complained that he had spilled some brandy on her dress. Mr. Skratdj
retorted that she should not wear dresses so susceptible of damage in
the family circle. Mrs. Skratdj recalled an old speech of Mr. Skratdj
on the subject of wearing one's nice things for the benefit of one's
family, and not reserving them for visitors. Mr. Skratdj remembered
that Mrs. Skratdj's excuse for buying that particular dress when she
did not need it, was her intention of keeping it for the next year.
The children disputed as to the credit for courage and the amount of
raisins due to each. Snap barked furiously at the flames; and the
maids hustled each other for good places in the doorway, and would not
have allowed the man-servant to see at all, but he looked over their
heads.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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