She holds it out with an unshaking hand, and commands her throat to
swallow, to drink a toast, the fulfilment or non-fulfilment of the wish
contained in which are alternatives equally horrible. And then they
return hand-in-hand--the old man has added a new caressingness to his
other tendernesses--and resume their places, one on each side of the
silent, motionless form stretched between them with bound, ice-covered
head, in the darkness; and Lavinia takes up again her day-long,
night-long employment of repeating over and over and over again to
herself the question which she is beginning to see written in red
whenever she turns her eyes in the obscurity--
“_Did_ he lose his head? _Was_ it suicide? And if so, was it something
he saw in her face that drove him to it?”
She is going through them in the usual sequence at about four o’clock in
the afternoon of her wedding day, when she happens to be for a few
moments alone with the still living rigidity beside her, when in the
almost complete darkness, her eyes and ears--or have they gone mad
too?--detect, or seem to detect, a slight movement in the bed. She darts
noiselessly to the window, and, pulling aside a bit of the curtain,
casts a glance backwards towards the bed--a glance that can hardly
travel, for the weight of the hope it carries. Whatever _she_ may be,
her senses are not mad; nor have they told her a lie. Rupert is feebly
stirring, and his eyes are open. In a second she is at his side, and
stooping over him; the word is coming--the priceless word on which her
reason hangs! It is spoken so low that she has to bend very close down
to catch it. It is only an almost inaudible--
“Well, dear!”
In the reeling immensity of her joy, she can but stupidly echo, almost
as inaudibly, the greeting that seems to have come to her from the
speechless other side. “Well, dear!” There is a long pause. Into
Rupert’s eyes, as they turn slowly round, the watcher sees
consciousness, recollection, gradually returning. When those long-absent
inhabitants have reoccupied their seats, will he take back his greeting?
While the answer to that inquiry is in suspense, the functions of life
seem suspended in her. The slowly wandering eyes return to their point
of departure--her face; regained knowledge is in them; but neither anger
nor pain.
“I muffed it, as usual,” he says, with a ghost of his old self-ridicule,
and, wearied with the exertion of speech, falls back into
unconsciousness.
* * * * *
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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