His reverie continued to grow clearer, and each moment he comprehended
his position better. It seemed to him that he had just awakened from
a dream, and that he was descending an incline in the middle of the
night, shuddering and recoiling in vain from the brink of an abyss.
He distinctly saw in the shadows an unknown man, a stranger, whom
destiny took for him, and thrust into the gulf in his place. In order
that the gulf should close, either he or another must fall in. He had
no necessity to do anything, the clearness became complete, and he
confessed to himself--that his place was vacant at the galleys; that,
whatever he might do, it constantly expected him, that the robbery
of Little Gervais led him back to it, that this vacant place would
wait for him and attract him until he filled it, and that this was
inevitable and fatal. And then he said to himself that at this moment
he had a substitute,--that it seemed a man of the name of Champmathieu
had this ill-luck; and that, in future, himself at the bagne in the
person of this Champmathieu, and present in society under the name of
M. Madeleine, would have nothing more to fear, provided that he did
not prevent justice from laying over the head of this Champmathieu the
stone of infamy which, like the tombstone, falls once and is never
raised again.
All this was so violent and so strange, that he suddenly felt within
him that species of indescribable movement which no man experiences
more than twice or thrice in his life,--a sort of convulsion of the
conscience, which disturbs everything doubtful in the heart, which
is composed of irony, joy, and despair, and what might be called an
internal burst of laughter. He suddenly relit his candle.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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