"That's all I want. Not too much to ask, is it? But, do you know what,
its hell on earth to get it... Yet, I shouldn't be short of patronage.
I have soared high in my time. I used to dine with the Marshal, the
prince, and ministers, all those people wanted me then because I amused
them--or frightened them. Now, no one does. Oh, my eyes! my poor, poor
eyes! I'm not welcome anywhere, now. It's unbearable being blind at
meal times.... Do pass me the bread, please.... Oh, those thieves! They
will make me pay through the nose for this damned tobacconist's shop.
I've been wandering through all the ministries clutching my petition,
for the last six months. I go in the morning at the time they light the
stoves and take His Excellence's horse around the sanded courtyard, and
I don't leave until night when they bring in the big lights and the
kitchens begin to smell really good....
"All my life is spent sitting on the wooden chests in the antechambers.
The ushers know who I am, as well--enough said. Inside the court they
call me _That kind man!_ So, to get them on my side, to amuse them, I
practise my wit, or, in a corner of their blotters, I draw rough
caricatures without taking the pen off the page.... See what I've come
to after twenty years of outstanding success; look at just what an
artist's life amounts to!... And to think there are forty thousand
rascals in France who slobber over our work! To think that throughout
Paris, every day, locomotives make steam to bring us loads of idiots
thirsting for waffle and printed gossip!... Oh, what a world of
fantasists. If only Bixiou's suffering could teach them a lesson."
With that, and without another word, he pushed his face towards the
plate and began to scoff the food.... It was pitiful to look at. He was
losing his bread, and his fork, and groping for his glass all the
time.... Poor soul! He just hadn't had the time to get used to it all
yet.
* * * * *
After a short time, he spoke again:
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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