Letters of Peregrine PickleUpton, George P. (George Putnam)
General
Letters of Peregrine Pickle
Upton, George P. (George Putnam)
Chicago (Ill.) -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction
I think that the women mainly come from the flowers and the birds.
You will find the analogies of nearly all women in the vegetable
kingdom. Some women, tender, delicate, fragile, and spiritual, have
all the attributes of the violet, and though they may blossom in
some out of the way corner, they make everything around them joyous
with their beauty and fragrance. Then there are others who flaunt
their heads with a pretty disdain, and dazzle you with the beauty
of their faces, but the moment you touch them, they fall to pieces
like the seeds of the dandelion. They won't bear handling. Then
there are women with strong natures, whose bodies are in harness,
and souls in curb, who resemble the tough azalea, with a stalk like
iron, and flowers we never care to gather, owing to their glutinous
consistency. There are other women whom you can't take hold of at
all. They repel you from every side like a porcupine. They resemble
the fruit of the Durion tree, which is excellent eating provided you
have courage enough to get through its hard spikes.
I was reading the other day that the birds of Paradise, when they are
in their most gorgeous plumage, select some tree, or other eligible
spot, go through with a regular dance for the edification of the
other birds, and, during the dance, display their lustrous feathers
by spreading them out as much as possible, and chatter together, in
an insanely garrulous manner.
I was about to make an application of this custom to women, when I
caught the eye of Mrs. Blobbs looking at me in a significant manner.
I confess to you I am a little afraid of that majestic woman when she
puts on her war-paint, and I immediately refrained, and we arose from
the table.
May 15, 1869.
_WOMAN IN CHURCH._
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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