I was about to send you this letter when I received yours. I have been
so engrossed in my reports and investigations that it has been
impossible to write sooner. I proposed a walk for Tuesday, on condition
that we should have an hour more together. Tell me if you are unengaged
Tuesday. Your absent-mindedness is very attractive, but have I anything
to do with it? That is the question. What have you to ask my pardon for?
Your sentiments are not at all like mine.
We are so unlike that it is hardly possible to understand each other.
All this does not prevent me from anticipating the pleasure of seeing
you. I thank you for your last letter; it is very sweet. You did not say
where you were going in the country, or when you expected to start. I
shall go to Rouen in a few days. Again, good-bye. I hope to see you
Tuesday, and that you will be in good spirits, and less downcast than I
am to-day.
LX
_Monday night, March 21, 1843._
I am terribly blue, and full of remorse for my anger to-day. The only
excuse I can offer is that the transition between our delicious stop in
that wonderful resting-place and the remainder of our walk was too
abrupt. It was like falling from heaven into hell. If I distressed you,
I am as repentant as I can be, but I hope I have not caused you to
suffer as much as I have myself. You have reproached me oftentimes for
being indifferent to everything; I suppose you meant only that I was
undemonstrative. When I am not myself, it is because I am in bodily
anguish. Admit that it is sad, after so long an acquaintance, and after
having become the friends we are, to see you always suspicious of me.
The weather to-day has been like our mood. It will clear to-night, I
think. The stars shine brighter than I have ever seen them. Let us
arrange some less stormy excursion. Good-bye. No more quarrels! I shall
try to be more reasonable. Do you try to be ruled more by your first
impulses.
LXI
_March, 1843._
I was as tired as if I had walked four or five leagues, but the fatigue
was so agreeable that I should like to repeat it. All was so successful,
that while I am accustomed to the success of a well-arranged plan,
nevertheless I share your astonishment. To be so free, and so far away
from the world, and that, too, by making use of the benefits of
civilisation, is it not amusing?
Do you know why I took only one blossom of those pretty white hyacinths?
It was because I wished to save some for another time. What do you
think of that? Besides, after consulting my map, I discovered that we
had mistaken the distance, and were about a quarter of a league out of
the way. We ought to have gone farther on, but we need regret nothing,
and next time we shall know better. For the first time it was not bad.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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