Letters to His Son, 1750: On the Fine Art of Becoming a Man of the World and a GentlemanChesterfield, Philip Dormer Stanhope, Earl of
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Letters to His Son, 1750: On the Fine Art of Becoming a Man of the World and a Gentleman
Chesterfield, Philip Dormer Stanhope, Earl of
Conduct of life
Sense will teach you some, observation others; attend carefully to the
manners, the diction, the motions, of people of the first fashion, and
form your own upon them. On the other hand, observe a little those of the
vulgar, in order to avoid them: for though the things which they say or
do may be the same, the manner is always totally different: and in that,
and nothing else, consists the characteristic of a man of fashion. The
lowest peasant speaks, moves, dresses, eats, and drinks, as much as a man
of the first fashion, but does them all quite differently; so that by
doing and saying most things in a manner opposite to that of the vulgar,
you have a great chance of doing and saying them right. There are
gradations in awkwardness and vulgarism, as there are in everything else.
'Les manieres de robe', though not quite right, are still better than
'les manieres bourgeoises'; and these, though bad, are still better than
'les manieres de campagne'. But the language, the air, the dress, and the
manners of the court, are the only true standard 'des manieres nobles, et
d'un honnete homme. Ex pede Herculem' is an old and true saying, and very
applicable to our present subject; for a man of parts, who has been bred
at courts, and used to keep the best company, will distinguish himself,
and is to be known from the vulgar by every word, attitude, gesture, and
even look. I cannot leave these seeming 'minutiae', without repeating to
you the necessity of your carving well; which is an article, little as it
is, that is useful twice every day of one's life; and the doing it ill is
very troublesome to one's self, and very disagreeable, often ridiculous,
to others.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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