Letters to His Son, 1752: On the Fine Art of Becoming a Man of the World and a GentlemanChesterfield, Philip Dormer Stanhope, Earl of
General
Letters to His Son, 1752: On the Fine Art of Becoming a Man of the World and a Gentleman
Chesterfield, Philip Dormer Stanhope, Earl of
Conduct of life
I have received your letter of the 15th, N. S., from Mayence, where I
find that you have diverted yourself much better than I expected. I am
very well acquainted with Comte Cobentzel's character, both of parts and
business. He could have given you letters to Bonn, having formerly
resided there himself. You will not be so agreeably ELECTRIFIED where
this letter will find you, as you were both at Manheim and Mayence; but I
hope you may meet with a second German Mrs. F-----d, who may make you
forget the two former ones, and practice your German. Such transient
passions will do you no harm; but, on the contrary, a great deal of good;
they will refine your manners and quicken your attention; they give a
young fellow 'du brillant', and bring him into fashion; which last is a
great article at setting out in the world.
I have wrote, about a month ago, to Lord Albemarle, to thank him for all
his kindnesses to you; but pray have you done as much? Those are the
necessary attentions which should never be omitted, especially in the
beginning of life, when a character is to be established.
That ready wit; which you so partially allow me, and so justly Sir
Charles Williams, may create many admirers; but, take my word for it, it
makes few friends. It shines and dazzles like the noon-day sun, but, like
that too, is very apt to scorch; and therefore is always feared. The
milder morning and evening light and heat of that planet soothe and calm
our minds. Good sense, complaisance, gentleness of manners, attentions
and graces are the only things that truly engage, and durably keep the
heart at long run. Never seek for wit; if it presents itself, well and
good; but, even in that case, let your judgment interpose; and take care
that it be not at the expense of anybody. Pope says very truly:
"There are whom heaven has blest with store of wit;
Yet want as much again to govern it."
And in another place, I doubt with too much truth:
"For wit and judgment ever are at strife
Though meant each other's aid, like man and wife."
The Germans are very seldom troubled with any extraordinary ebullitions
or effervescenses of wit, and it is not prudent to try it upon them;
whoever does, 'ofendet solido'.
Remember to write me very minute accounts of all your transactions at
Hanover, for they excite both my impatience and anxiety. Adieu!
LETTER CLXXIV
LONDON, August 4, O. S. 1752
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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