On the 11th I received your dear, good letters of September, as well as
letters from all the family. I need not tell you the intense joy I felt
in reading words from you.
I thank you for remembering my birthday. I will not speak of it further,
for we must not linger over sad memories. What we need now, as you have
said so truly, is reality, the truth. After one has suffered in a manner
so atrocious and for so long a time, one’s energies, one’s activity,
above all, ought to grow in proportion to the sufferings which one
endures. Strong in your conscience, it is your right, I will even say it
is your duty, to attempt all, to dare all, in order to throw light upon
this tragic story, to regain at last our honor, the honor of our
children.
As I have told you, in this situation, as horrible as it is undeserved,
which would soon crush us, there no longer can be any thought of waiting
for some happy chance, such as we have already waited for too long.
You have now received my letters of October. You ought to act with the
force given by my innocence, with the power inspired by the knowledge
that you have a noble mission to fulfill.
If I have told you to ask to have this matter cleared up by every, if
even by heroic means, it is because there are situations which, when
they are undeserved, are too much to be endured, which we must put an
end to. You know that your soul and mine are but one; they throb
together; and what I have told you must certainly have made yours
tremble and throb.
So I am now waiting for the end of this awful drama, and I count the
days.
Thanks for the good news that you give me of the children. Kiss them
fondly for me until I can embrace them for myself.
My tenderest kisses for you.
From your devoted
ALFRED.
Embrace your dear parents, all our family, for me.
I do not know by what route you sent the books and the reviews that you
spoke of in your letters of the 25th of August, but they certainly have
not yet arrived at Guiana.
* * * * *
_27 December, 1895._
My dear Lucie:
I have not yet received your dear letters of October. Neither the French
mail of November nor the English mail of December has brought them. What
does it mean? What ought I to think of it? In what horrible nightmare
have I lived for almost fifteen months?
As for suffering, alas! my poor darling, we both know what that is; and
besides that, sufferings are of little importance, no matter what they
are. What you must have is our honor, the honor of our children.
I wrote you a long letter on the 2d of December. To add anything to that
letter, or, indeed, to any that preceded it, would be superfluous, would
it not? Our thoughts are the same; our hearts have always beaten as one;
our souls thrill together to-day, and they cry out for their honor with
the burning ardor of honorable hearts struck in all that they hold most
precious.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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