So it was a beautiful winter for them both. Naturally there was the
fact of Ida that had to be faced. That was tremendously hard at first.
He constantly felt her grieving for him, for the failure of all his
hopes, the wreck of all a man holds so precious. And there were all
the details of Ida's sickness and death to be gone over with her
mother--the things she had done just before. How she looked; the
quantity of flowers; even what she wore for her burial. Instinctively
Haldane knew how dear these matters were to her, and he went over them
faithfully, effacing his own bitterness of memory as best he might.
When Mrs. Locke hesitatingly asked him one evening if--if Ida had--had
_said_ anything--left any message for _her_, Haldane's heart
ached for her; Ida had left no message. He softened it as best he
might.
"You see, she didn't know, couldn't know, that--that she was going to
die. It was all so sudden, you know, so awfully sudden."
Mrs. Locke nodded. "Yes--I see. Poor Ida! She did so much for me
always."
After a month or so, quite unconsciously, they ceased to mention Ida.
Haldane, when he thought of it at all--and that with relief--wondered
vaguely why Ida's mother did not talk more about her. "Perhaps it's
because she doesn't want to keep hurting me," he thought it out,
"bless her!"
Gradually the intimacy between Haldane and his mother--for she was
quite that to him--grew into a relation that was as rare as it was
tender. They both felt it keenly. Their talk was all of him, his
affairs, his music. He played to her for hours in the evenings he was
not at the orchestra; when he was teaching in the mornings she would
steal into the room, and sit, sewing, in a corner, listening
gratefully to the dreary routine of his pupils' exercises. She seemed
never to tire of "being near Leonard." And always she was asking,
"Won't you play a little from _the opera_, Leonard?"
Once she said to him, with her timid smile: "It's like heaven, having
so much music all the time. Seems as if all my life I've been just
starved to death for tunes."
Haldane bent and kissed her white hair. "Well, mother," he laughed,
"it's quite a real piece of heaven to have you around the place."
"You're spoiling me," she cried; "how can I ever go back to Iowa?"
"Who said Iowa in this house?" he demanded of her. "You're to stay
always--as long as you can stand me--_always_."
"My son!" she kept murmuring after he had gone, as if she loved the
words on her lips. "He's just the kind of son I used to hope I might
have," she sighed. "I don't see--it's so strange why he's so good to
me. I'm not at all like _her_. Ida was so sensible always, and
I'm not at all--Ida always told me I couldn't take care of myself,
that I was very foolish. I don't see why Leonard is so kind to me. It
must be just because I'm her mother. Leonard must have loved her so
much, and understood her. Poor Ida!"
* * * * *
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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