Reader, in the course of thirteen months, only one, of from fifty to
sixty letters which I addressed to my mother, was ever received by her,
and that one was this very letter. The monks, instead of forwarding
mine, had forged letters imitating the hand-writing, and adopting a
style suited to their purpose; and instead of consigning to me the
genuine replies, they artfully substituted answers of their own
fabrication. My family, therefore, were not surprised at the tenor of
this epistle, but rejoiced over it, and reputed me already a Saint. They
probably pictured me to themselves, on some future day, with a mitre on
my head--with the red cap--nay, perhaps, even wearing the triple crown.
Oh, what a delusion! Poor deceived parents! You knew not that your son,
in anguish and despair, was clashing his chains, and devouring his tears
in secret; that a triple bandage was placed before his eyes, and that
he was being dragged, an unwilling victim, to the sacrifice." Returning
home soon after, Ciocci rushed to his mother, and asked if she had
his letters. They, were produced; when he found that only one had been
written by him. The rest were forgeries of the masters.]
"It follows then," said my father, "that these letters are forgeries,
and the excuses they have so often made are base falsehoods. A teacher
of the religion of Jesus Christ guilty of lying and forgery! 'O, my soul
come not thou into their secret; unto their assembly mine honor be thou
not united.'"
"But we have our darling home again," said I, "and now we shall keep her
with us." Never shall I forget the sweet, sad smile that came over her
pale face as I uttered these words. Perchance, even then she realized
that she was soon to leave us, never more to return. However this may
be, she gradually declined. Slowly, but surely she went down to the
grave. Every remedy was tried--every measure resorted to, that seemed
to promise relief, but all in vain. We had the best physicians, but they
frankly confessed that they did not understand her disease. In a very
few months after her return, we laid our lovely and beloved sister
beneath the clods of the valley. Our good old physician wept as he gazed
upon her cold remains. I believe he thought she was poisoned, but as he
could not prove it, he would only have injured himself by saying so. As
for myself, I always thought that she knew too many of their secrets to
be allowed to live after leaving them. "And now, dear," she continued,
"do you think it strange that I hate the Romanists? Do you wonder if I
feel like swearing when I think of priests and convents?"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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