Life of John Coleridge Patteson : Missionary Bishop of the Melanesian IslandsYonge, Charlotte M. (Charlotte Mary)
Religion
Life of John Coleridge Patteson : Missionary Bishop of the Melanesian Islands
Yonge, Charlotte M. (Charlotte Mary)
Missions -- Melanesia; Patteson, John Coleridge, 1827-1871
There had for more than a year been cause of anxiety for Sir John's
health, but it was not the disease that had then threatened which
occasioned the following calm-hearted letter to be written to his son:--
'Feniton Court: March 22, 1861.
'My own dearest Coley,--I promised always to tell you the truth
respecting myself, and will do so. About a month ago, on my rising from
reading prayers, the girls and the Dawlish party who were here exclaimed
that my voice was broken, at which I laughed. Whitby was in London, but
his partner happened to call, and looking at my throat found it relaxed,
and recommended a mustard poultice on the front. When we came to put it
on, we discovered that the glands of the throat were much swelled and
in hard knots. Whitby returned in two days, and was much alarmed. He
declared that it was serious, and nothing but iodine could check it.
I had been unable to take iodine under Watson some years ago, as it
affected my head tremendously, so he applied it outwardly by painting;
this painting did not reduce them, and he strongly pressed my having
London advice, for he said that if not reduced and the swellings
increased internally, they would press on the windpipe and choke me: it
was somewhat a surgical matter. So on Tuesday the 12th inst. we went
to London, and I consulted Paget. He entirely agreed with Whitby, and
thought it very serious, and ordered iodine internally at all hazards. I
took it, and by God's mercy it agreed with me. Paget wished to talk over
the case with Watson, and they met on the 16th, Saturday. They quite
agreed, and did not conceal from me that if iodine did not reduce the
swellings, and they should increase internally, the result must be
fatal. How soon, or in what particular manner, they could not tell; it
might even become cancerous. They did not wish me to stay in town,
but thought I was better here, and Paget, knowing Whitby, has perfect
confidence in his watching, and will correspond with him, if necessary.
At present there is no reduction of the swellings. The iodine has
certainly lessened the pains in my limbs, but does not seem, so to
speak, to determine to the throat, but it may be there has been hardly
time to say that it will not. My own impression is, that it will not,
and that it is highly improbable that I shall last very long. I mean
that I shall not see 1862, nor perhaps the summer or autumn of this
year. I cannot tell why, but this near prospect of death has not given
me any severe shock, as perhaps it ought to have done. It brings more
than ever to my mind serious recollection of the sins of my youth, and
the shortcomings of my after life in thousands of instances. I have
never been a hardened sinner, but years ago, if I did what was sin, it
smote me, and I tried to repent; yet there has always been in me a want
of fervid love to God, and to my blessed Redeemer for His unspeakable
love in suffering for my sins; but it has been cold--that may have been
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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