Life's Little Ironies: A set of tales with some colloquial sketches entitled A Few Crusted CharactersHardy, Thomas
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Life's Little Ironies: A set of tales with some colloquial sketches entitled A Few Crusted Characters
Hardy, Thomas
Short stories, English; Wessex (England) -- Fiction
‘It was a long while before the story of what they had gone through was
known, but it was talked of in time, and they themselves laugh over it
now; though what Jane got for her pains was no great bargain after all.
’Tis true she saved her name.’
‘Was that the same Andrey who went to the squire’s house as one of the
Christmas fiddlers?’ asked the seedsman.
‘No, no,’ replied Mr. Profitt, the schoolmaster. ‘It was his father did
that. Ay, it was all owing to his being such a man for eating and
drinking.’ Finding that he had the ear of the audience, the
schoolmaster continued without delay:—
OLD ANDREY’S EXPERIENCE AS A MUSICIAN
‘I was one of the choir-boys at that time, and we and the players were
to appear at the manor-house as usual that Christmas week, to play and
sing in the hall to the squire’s people and visitors (among ’em being
the archdeacon, Lord and Lady Baxby, and I don’t know who); afterwards
going, as we always did, to have a good supper in the servants’ hall.
Andrew knew this was the custom, and meeting us when we were starting
to go, he said to us: “Lord, how I should like to join in that meal of
beef, and turkey, and plum-pudding, and ale, that you happy ones be
going to just now! One more or less will make no difference to the
squire. I am too old to pass as a singing boy, and too bearded to pass
as a singing girl; can ye lend me a fiddle, neighbours, that I may come
with ye as a bandsman?”
‘Well, we didn’t like to be hard upon him, and lent him an old one,
though Andrew knew no more of music than the Cerne Giant; and armed
with the instrument he walked up to the squire’s house with the others
of us at the time appointed, and went in boldly, his fiddle under his
arm. He made himself as natural as he could in opening the music-books
and moving the candles to the best points for throwing light upon the
notes; and all went well till we had played and sung “While shepherds
watch,” and “Star, arise,” and “Hark the glad sound.” Then the squire’s
mother, a tall gruff old lady, who was much interested in church-music,
said quite unexpectedly to Andrew: “My man, I see you don’t play your
instrument with the rest. How is that?”
‘Every one of the choir was ready to sink into the earth with concern
at the fix Andrew was in. We could see that he had fallen into a cold
sweat, and how he would get out of it we did not know.
‘“I’ve had a misfortune, mem,” he says, bowing as meek as a child.
“Coming along the road I fell down and broke my bow.”
‘“Oh, I am sorry to hear that,” says she. “Can’t it be mended?”
‘“Oh no, mem,” says Andrew. “’Twas broke all to splinters.”
‘“I’ll see what I can do for you,” says she.
‘And then it seemed all over, and we played “Rejoice, ye drowsy mortals
all,” in D and two sharps. But no sooner had we got through it than she
says to Andrew,
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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