Life's Progress Through the Passions; Or, The Adventures of NaturaHaywood, Eliza Fowler
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Life's Progress Through the Passions; Or, The Adventures of Natura
Haywood, Eliza Fowler
English fiction -- 18th century
After Natura came home, and had leisure to meditate on this affair, he
began with thinking how terrible it would be to him, to see Charlotte
in the arms of a husband; and when he reflected, that such a thing
might be possible, even though he doubted not the sincerity of her
present aversion, the idea was scarce to be borne:--from this he
naturally fell on figuring to himself how great a blessing that man
would enjoy, who should always have the sweet society of so amiable a
companion;--and this made him cry out, 'Why then, what hinders me from
endeavouring to become that happy man?--If I resolved against any
future marriage, it was when I knew not the adorable Charlotte, nor
believed there was so excellent a woman in the world.'--In this
rapturous imagination did he continue for a moment, but then the
improbability of succeeding in any such attempt, struck him with an
adequate despair.--'Though the uncommon merit of the woman I adore,'
said he, 'compels me to change the resolution I had taken, there is
not the same reason to prevail on her to recede from her's.--Past the
bloom of life, and already twice a husband, can I flatter myself with
the fond hope she will not reject the proposals I should make with the
same scorn she did those of the councillor?'
Charlotte, on the other hand, was engrossed by reflections vastly
different from those she was accustomed to entertain:--never woman was
more free from vanity, or thought less of the power of her charms, yet
she could not hinder herself from thinking there was somewhat in the
behaviour of Natura, in his last visit, that denoted a regard beyond
an ordinary friendship for her.--This apprehension, at first, a little
startled her, or at least she imagined it did so, and she said to
herself, 'If he should really harbour any inclinations for me of that
sort, how unhappy should I be in being obliged to break off my
acquaintance with a person so every way agreeable to me; and to
continue it, would be to countenance a passion I have determined never
to give the least attention to.'--'Yet wherefore did I determine?'
pursued she, with a sigh, 'but because I found the generality of men
mere wandering, vague, inconstant creatures;--were guided only by
fancy;--never consulted their judgment, whether the object they
pretended to admire, had any real merit or not, and often too treated
those worst who had the best claim to their esteem;--besides, one
seldom finds a man whose person and qualifications are every way
suited to one's liking:--Natura is certainly such as I should wish a
husband to be, if I were inclined to marry again;--I have not taken a
vow of celibacy, and have nobody to controul my actions':--'then,'
said she again, 'what foolish imaginations comes into my head; perhaps
he has not the least thought of me in the way I am dreaming of;--no,
no, he has suffered too much by the imprudence of one woman, to put it
in the power of another to treat him in the same manner;--be trembles
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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