If Natura rejoiced to find himself cleared of having been the death of a fellow-creature, he was equally mortified at having rendered himself obnoxious to those who alone were capable of gratifying his ambition: as for the change in the lady's sentiments concerning him, he was under much less concern; he thought the affection she professed for him must have been very small, when a difference of opinion in state-affairs, and that too but supposed, could all at once erace it, and rather despised, than lamented, the bigotry of party-zeal, which had occasioned it:--his good sense made him know, that to deny all the good qualities of a person, meerly because those good qualities were not ornamented with the favours of fortune, was both unjust and mean; and the proof she gave of her weakness and ungenerosity in this point, intirely destroyed all the passion he once had for her, and consequently all regret for the loss of her. He could not, however, think of returning to England yet a while; his father's letter had given some hints, as if there was a design on foot, and he was confirmed soon after of the truth of it, for expelling him the house; and he thought it was best to spare his enemies that labour, and quit it of his own accord: and in this he found himself intirely right, when on writing to some persons of condition, with whom he had been most intimate, he found by their answers, that it was now known he had been in the French service, which both himself and his father had kept a secret, even from their nearest kindred; not there was any thing in it which could be construed into a crime, as the nations were then in alliance, but because as he could not possibly enjoy a commission there, without conforming to the ceremonies of the Romish church, it must infallibly be a hindrance to his advancement in a Protestant country. It is certain, Natura was of a temper to make good the proverb, _That when one is at Rome, one must do as they do at Rome_:--and though he had gone to hear _mass_, because it was his interest, and the necessity of his affairs obliging him in a manner to seek his bread at that time, yet was he far from approving the superstitions of that church; all that he could write, however, or his friends urge for him on this head, was ineffectual; he passed for a _papist_ and _jacobite_ with every body: pursuant therefore to his resolution of continuing abroad, till these discourses should be a little worn out, he wrote again to his father, and settled his affairs so as to receive remittances of money, at the several places to which he intended to go. CHAP. IV.