Life Without and Life Within; or, Reviews, Narratives, Essays, and Poems.Fuller, Margaret
History
Life Without and Life Within; or, Reviews, Narratives, Essays, and Poems.
Fuller, Margaret
Essays; Literature -- History and criticism; Poetry
A strange bird she proved there--a lonely one, that could not make for
itself a summer. At first, her schoolmates were captivated with her
ways, her love of wild dances and sudden song, her freaks of passion
and of wit. She was always new, always surprising, and, for a time,
charming.
But, after a while, they tired of her. She could never be depended on to
join in their plans, yet she expected them to follow out hers with their
whole strength. She was very loving, even infatuated in her own
affections, and exacted from those who had professed any love for her,
the devotion she was willing to bestow.
Yet there was a vein of haughty caprice in her character; a love of
solitude, which made her at times wish to retire entirely; and at these
times she would expect to be thoroughly understood, and let alone, yet
to be welcomed back when she returned. She did not thwart others in
their humors, but she never doubted of great indulgence from them.
Some singular ways she had, which, when new, charmed, but, after
acquaintance, displeased her companions. She had by nature the same
habit and power of excitement that is described in the spinning
dervishes of the East. Like them, she would spin until all around her
were giddy, while her own brain, instead of being disturbed, was excited
to great action. Pausing, she would declaim verse of others or her own;
perform many parts, with strange catch-words and burdens that seemed to
act with mystical power on her own fancy, sometimes stimulating her to
convulse the hearer with laughter, sometimes to melt him to tears. When
her power began to languish, she would spin again till fired to
recommence her singular drama, into which she wove figures from the
scenes of her earlier childhood, her companions, and the dignitaries she
sometimes saw, with fantasies unknown to life, unknown to heaven or
earth.
This excitement, as may be supposed, was not good for her. It oftenest
came on in the evening, and spoiled her sleep. She would wake in the
night, and cheat her restlessness by inventions that teased, while they
sometimes diverted her companions.
She was also a sleep-walker; and this one trait of her case did somewhat
alarm her guardians, who, otherwise, showed the same profound stupidity,
as to this peculiar being, usual in the overseers of the young. They
consulted a physician, who said she would outgrow it, and prescribed a
milk diet.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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