United States -- Social life and customs -- 20th century -- Fiction
“Gamey old brute!” was what one of the reporters said in the elevator.
He could not read Marcus Aurelius after that. He went to bed, but he did
not sleep. Many things passed before him. His anticipations, his dreams
for Fritz, had brought the warmest pleasure of his stern, unrelaxing
life. There was a great emptiness tonight. What was a man to turn to,
think about, when he seemed stripped, not only of the future, but of the
past? He seemed called upon to readjust the whole of his life, giving
up that which he had held dearest. What was left? Daylight found him
turning it over and over.
In the morning he went home. He got away without seeing any of his
friends.
He did not try to read this morning; somehow it seemed there was no use
in trying to read any more. He watched the country through which they
were passing, thinking of the hundreds of times he had ridden over it in
campaigning. He wondered, vaguely, just how much money he had spent on
railroad fare--he had never accepted mileage. Fred's “What's the use?”
kept ringing in his ears. There was something about that phrase which
made one feel very tired and old. It even seemed there was no use
looking out to see how the crops were getting on. _What's the use?
What's the use?_ Was that a phrase one learned in college?
There had been two things to tell “mother” that night. The first was
that he had stopped in town and told Claus Hansen he could have that
south hundred and sixty he had been wanting for two years.
It was not easy to tell the woman who had worked shoulder to shoulder
with him for thirty years, the woman who during those years had risen
with him in the early morning and worked with him until darkness rescued
the weary bodies, that in their old age they must surrender the fruit of
their toil. They would have left just what they had started with. They
had just held their own.
Coming down on the train he had made up his mind that if Hansen were
in town he would tell him that he could have the land. He felt so very
tired and old, so bowed down with Fred's “What's the use?” that he saw
that he himself would never get the mortgage paid off. And Fred had said
something about making the railroads pay it. He did not know just how
the boy figured that out--indeed, he was getting a little dazed about
the whole thing--but if Fritz had any idea of having the railroads pay
off the mortgage on _his_ farm--he couldn't forget how the boy looked
when he said it, face white, eyes burning--he would see to it right now
that there was no chance of that.
He tried not to look at the land as he drove past it on the way home. He
wondered just how much campaign literature it had paid for. He wondered
if he would ever get used to seeing Claus Hansen putting up his hay over
there in that field.
He had felt so badly about telling mother that he told it very bluntly.
And because he felt so sorry for her he said not one kind word, but just
sat quiet, looking the other way.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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