Lincoln's yarns and stories : $b A complete collection of the funny and witty anecdotes that made Lincoln famous as America's greatest story tellerMcClure, Alexander K. (Alexander Kelly)
History
Lincoln's yarns and stories : $b A complete collection of the funny and witty anecdotes that made Lincoln famous as America's greatest story teller
McClure, Alexander K. (Alexander Kelly)
Lincoln, Abraham, 1809-1865 -- Anecdotes
“Mr. L.,” he said, “was a very good bar-tender!” This brought the laugh
on Lincoln, whose reply, however, soon came, and then the laugh was on
the other side.
“What Mr. Douglas has said, gentlemen,” replied Lincoln, “is true
enough; I did keep a grocery and I did sell cotton, candles and cigars,
and sometimes whiskey; but I remember in those days that Mr. Douglas was
one of my best customers.”
“I can also say this; that I have since left my side of the counter,
while Mr. Douglas still sticks to his!”
This brought such a storm of cheers and laughter that Douglas was unable
to reply.
“FIXED UP” A BIT FOR THE “CITY FOLKS.”
Mrs. Lincoln knew her husband was not “pretty,” but she liked to have
him presentable when he appeared before the public. Stephen Fiske, in
“When Lincoln Was First Inaugurated,” tells of Mrs. Lincoln’s anxiety
to have the President-elect “smoothed down” a little when receiving a
delegation that was to greet them upon reaching New York City.
“The train stopped,” writes Mr. Fiske, “and through the windows immense
crowds could be seen; the cheering drowning the blowing off of steam of
the locomotive. Then Mrs. Lincoln opened her handbag and said:
“‘Abraham, I must fix you up a bit for these city folks.’
“Mr. Lincoln gently lifted her upon the seat before him; she parted,
combed and brushed his hair and arranged his black necktie.
“‘Do I look nice now, mother?’ he affectionately asked.
“‘Well, you’ll do, Abraham,’ replied Mrs. Lincoln critically. So he
kissed her and lifted her down from the seat, and turned to meet Mayor
Wood, courtly and suave, and to have his hand shaken by the other New
York officials.”
EVEN REBELS OUGHT TO BE SAVED.
The Rev. Mr. Shrigley, of Philadelphia, a Universalist, had been
nominated for hospital chaplain, and a protesting delegation went to
Washington to see President Lincoln on the subject.
“We have called, Mr. President, to confer with you in regard to the
appointment of Mr. Shrigley, of Philadelphia, as hospital chaplain.”
The President responded: “Oh, yes, gentlemen. I have sent his name to
the Senate, and he will no doubt be confirmed at an early date.” One of
the young men replied: “We have not come to ask for the appointment, but
to solicit you to withdraw the nomination.”
“Ah!” said Lincoln, “that alters the case; but on what grounds do you
wish the nomination withdrawn?”
The answer was: “Mr. Shrigley is not sound in his theological opinions.”
The President inquired: “On what question is the gentleman unsound?”
Response: “He does not believe in endless punishment; not only so, sir,
but he believes that even the rebels themselves will be finally saved.”
“Is that so?” inquired the President.
The members of the committee responded, “Yes, yes.’
“Well, gentlemen, if that be so, and there is any way under Heaven
whereby the rebels can be saved, then, for God’s sake and their sakes,
let the man be appointed.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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