Lincoln's yarns and stories : $b A complete collection of the funny and witty anecdotes that made Lincoln famous as America's greatest story tellerMcClure, Alexander K. (Alexander Kelly)
History
Lincoln's yarns and stories : $b A complete collection of the funny and witty anecdotes that made Lincoln famous as America's greatest story teller
McClure, Alexander K. (Alexander Kelly)
Lincoln, Abraham, 1809-1865 -- Anecdotes
This journal was not entirely friendly to the new Chief Magistrate, but
it could not see into the future. Many of the leading publications of
the East, among them some of those which condemned slavery and were
opposed to secession, did not believe Lincoln was the man for the
emergency, but instead of doing what they could do to help him along,
they attacked him most viciously. No man, save Washington, was more
brutally lied about than Lincoln, but he bore all the slurs and thrusts,
not to mention the open, cruel antagonism of those who should have been
his warmest friends, with a fortitude and patience few men have ever
shown. He was on the right road, and awaited the time when his course
should receive the approval it merited.
“WHAT’S-HIS-NAME” GOT THERE.
General James B. Fry told a good one on Secretary of War Stanton,
who was worsted in a contention with the President. Several
brigadier-generals were to be selected, and Lincoln maintained that
“something must be done in the interest of the Dutch.” Many complaints
had come from prominent men, born in the Fatherland, but who were
fighting for the Union.
“Now, I want Schimmelpfennig given one of those brigadierships.”
Stanton was stubborn and headstrong, as usual, but his manner and tone
indicated that the President would have his own way in the end. However,
he was not to be beaten without having made a fight.
“But, Mr. President,” insisted the Iron War Secretary, “it may be that
this Mr. Schim--what’s-his-name--has no recommendations showing his
fitness. Perhaps he can’t speak English.”
“That doesn’t matter a bit, Stanton,” retorted Lincoln, “he may be deaf
and dumb for all I know, but whatever language he speaks, if any, we can
furnish troops who will understand what he says. That name of his will
make up for any differences in religion, politics or understanding, and
I’ll take the risk of his coming out all right.”
Then, slamming his great hand upon the Secretary’s desk, he said,
“Schim-mel-fen-nig must be appointed.”
And he was, there and then.
A REALLY GREAT GENERAL.
“Do you know General A--?” queried the President one day to a friend who
had “dropped in” at the White House.
“Certainly; but you are not wasting any time thinking about him, are
you?” was the rejoinder.
“You wrong him,” responded the President, “he is a really great man, a
philosopher.”
“How do you make that out? He isn’t worth the powder and ball necessary
to kill him so I have heard military men say,” the friend remarked.
“He is a mighty thinker,” the President returned, “because he has
mastered that ancient and wise admonition, ‘Know thyself;’ he has formed
an intimate acquaintance with himself, knows as well for what he is
fitted and unfitted as any man living. Without doubt he is a remarkable
man. This War has not produced another like him.”
“How is it you are so highly pleased with General A---- all at once?”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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