Lincoln's yarns and stories : $b A complete collection of the funny and witty anecdotes that made Lincoln famous as America's greatest story tellerMcClure, Alexander K. (Alexander Kelly)
History
Lincoln's yarns and stories : $b A complete collection of the funny and witty anecdotes that made Lincoln famous as America's greatest story teller
McClure, Alexander K. (Alexander Kelly)
Lincoln, Abraham, 1809-1865 -- Anecdotes
“For the reason,” replied Mr. Lincoln, with a merry twinkle of the
eye, “greatly to my relief, and to the interests of the country, he has
resigned. The country should express its gratitude in some substantial
way.”
“SHRUNK UP NORTH.”
There was no member of the Cabinet from the South when Attorney-General
Bates handed in his resignation, and President Lincoln had a great deal
of trouble in making a selection. Finally Titian F. Coffey consented to
fill the vacant place for a time, and did so until the appointment of
Mr. Speed.
In conversation with Mr. Coffey the President quaintly remarked:
“My Cabinet has shrunk up North, and I must find a Southern man. I
suppose if the twelve Apostles were to be chosen nowadays, the shrieks
of locality would have to be heeded.”
LINCOLN ADOPTED THE SUGGESTION.
It is not generally known that President Lincoln adopted a suggestion
made by Secretary of the Treasury Salmon P. Chase in regard to the
Emancipation Proclamation, and incorporated it in that famous document.
After the President had read it to the members of the Cabinet he
asked if he had omitted anything which should be added or inserted to
strengthen it. It will be remembered that the closing paragraph of the
Proclamation reads in this way:
“And upon this act, sincerely believed to be an act of justice warranted
by the Constitution, I invoke the considerate judgment of mankind, and
the gracious favor of Almighty God!” President Lincoln’s draft of the
paper ended with the word “mankind,” and the words, “and the gracious
favor of Almighty God,” were those suggested by Secretary Chase.
SOMETHING FOR EVERYONE.
It was the President’s overweening desire to accommodate all persons
who came to him soliciting favors, but the opportunity was never offered
until an untimely and unthinking disease, which possessed many of the
characteristics of one of the most dreaded maladies, confined him to his
bed at the White House.
The rumor spread that the President was afflicted with this disease,
while the truth was that it was merely a very mild attack of varioloid.
The office-seekers didn’t know the facts, and for once the Executive
Mansion was clear of them.
One day, a man from the West, who didn’t read the papers, but wanted the
postoffice in his town, called at the White House. The President,
being then practically a well man, saw him. The caller was engaged in
a voluble endeavor to put his capabilities in the most favorable light,
when the President interrupted him with the remark that he would be
compelled to make the interview short, as his doctor was due.
“Why, Mr. President, are you sick?” queried the visitor.
“Oh, nothing much,” replied Mr. Lincoln, “but the physician says he
fears the worst.”
“What worst, may I ask?”
“Smallpox,” was the answer; “but you needn’t be scared. I’m only in the
first stages now.”
The visitor grabbed his hat, sprang from his chair, and without a word
bolted for the door.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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