Lives and exploits of the most noted highwaymen, robbers and murderers of all nations: Drawn from the most authentic sources and brought down to the present timeWhitehead, Charles
History
Lives and exploits of the most noted highwaymen, robbers and murderers of all nations: Drawn from the most authentic sources and brought down to the present time
Whitehead, Charles
Brigands and robbers -- Great Britain; Criminals -- Great Britain; Murderers -- Great Britain
A cardinal at Padua, who was at the point of death, under the influence
of this distemper, being past all hopes of recovery, his servants had
begun to pillage his house, and even to make free with the hangings of
his own bed. An ape, in the midst of this bustle, seized a nightcap
that lay near, fixed it upon his head, and made so many and such
curious tricks, that his reverence fell into a fit of laughter, and
broke the imposthume, to the preservation of his life and property.
Another instance may be related. A countrywoman, very ignorant and
superstitious, took it into her head to send for the parson of the
parish to pray for the recovery of her cow, which was affected with
a distemper incident to animals of that species. Not suspecting but
that he was called to visit the woman herself, or some of her family
in affliction, the pious man went forthwith, and, to his surprise, was
not only informed why he was sent for, but the good woman insisted that
he should go and see her cow before she would allow him to depart.
Unable to resist her importunities, he went to the byre, and taking
a handful of the short straw that lay beside the cow, spread it upon
her back, saying, “Poor beast, if you be no better for this, you will
be no worse.” The parson returned home, and the good woman was highly
displeased with his indifference towards her favorite cow.
It happened, soon after, that she had an opportunity to retaliate:
the parson was taken dangerously ill of an imposthume, and the woman,
hearing of it, went to return his visit. Arrived at the parson’s house,
she, in consequence of her importunities, was admitted into his
bedchamber; and, having kindly inquired after his health, went forward
to the chimney, and taking up a handful of ashes from the hearth,
scattered them over the parson, using his own words, “Poor man! if you
be no better for this, you will be no worse;” which raised such a fit
of laughter in the good man, that his imposthume broke and his cure was
effected.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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