“Oh, my dear!” he breathed to himself, in an agony of love and
self-restraint. But she did not hear the breath. She was engaged in a
struggle of her own, and she seemed to remember that Hester-girl, and
know her duty. She must not let him see how she felt, not for anything
in the world. He was kind and tender. He had always been. He had denied
himself and come here to stay with them in their need because of his
gratitude toward her father for all he had done for him; and he had
breathed that “dear” as he would have done to any little child of the
tenement whom he found in trouble. Oh, she understood, even while she
let the word comfort her lonely heart. Why, oh why had she been left to
trifle with a handsome scoundrel? Why hadn’t she been worthy to have
won the love of a great man like this one?
These thoughts rushed through her brain so rapidly that they were not
formulated at all. Not until hours afterward did she know they had been
thought; but afterwards she sorted them out and put them in array
before her troubled heart.
A minute she struggled with her tears, and then in a sweet little
voice, like a tired, naughty child she broke out:
“Oh, Michael, you’ve been so good to me—to us, I mean—staying here all
these weeks and not showing a bit of impatience when you had all that
great work in the world to do—and I’ve just been thinking how perfectly
horrid I was to you last winter—the things I said and wrote to you—and
how I treated you when you were trying to save me from an awful fate!
I’m so ashamed, and so thankful! It all came over me tonight what I
owed you, and I can’t ever thank you. Can you forgive me for the horrid
way I acted, and for passing you on the street that Sunday without
speaking to you—I’m so ashamed! Will you forgive me?”
She put out her little hands with a pathetic motion toward him in the
half light of the room, and he took them in both his great warm ones
and held them in his firm grasp, his whole frame thrilling with her
sweet touch. “Forgive you, little Starr!” he breathed—“I never blamed
you—” And there is no telling what might not have happened if the
doctor had not just then unexpectedly arrived to perfect the
arrangements for their going to the farm.
When Michael returned from letting the doctor out, Starr had fled
upstairs to her room; when they met the next morning it was with the
bustle of preparation upon them; and each cast shy smiling glances
toward the other. Starr knew that she was forgiven, but she also knew
that there was a wall reared between them that had not been there
before, and her heart ached with the knowledge. Nevertheless, it was a
happy morning, and one could not be absolutely miserable in the company
of Michael, with a father who was recovering rapidly, and the prospect
of seeing him and going with him into the beautiful out-of-doors within
a few hours.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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