And what had he lost that had been his before? Not the beautiful girl
who had been the idol of his heart all these years. She was still
there, alive and well, and more beautiful than ever. His devotion might
yet stand between her and harm if need arose. True, he had lost the
hope of companionship with her, but that had been the growth of a day.
He had never had much of it before, nor expected it when he came North.
It would have been a glory and a joy beyond expression, but one could
live without those things and be true. There was some reason for it all
somewhere in the infinite he was sure.
It was not like the ordinary boy to philosophize in this way, but
Michael had never been an ordinary boy. Ever his soul had been open to
the greatness of the universe and sunny toward the most trying
surroundings. He had come out of the hardest struggle his soul had yet
met, but he had come out a man. There were lines about his pleasant
mouth that had not been there the day before, which spoke of strength
and self-control. There were new depths in his eyes as of one who had
looked down, and seen things unspeakable, having to number himself with
the lowly.
A new thought came to him while he lay there trying to take in the
change that had come to him. The thought of his childhood companions,
the little waifs like himself who came from the offscourings of the
earth. They had loved him he knew. He recalled slowly, laboriously,
little incidents from his early history. They were dim and uncertain,
many of them, but little kindnesses stood out. A bad cut on his foot
once and how Buck had bathed it and bound it up in dirty rags, doing
double duty with the newspapers for several days to save his friend
from stepping. There was a bitter cold night way back as far as he
could remember when he had had bad luck, and came among the others
supperless and almost freezing. Buck had shared a crust and found a
warm boiler-room where they crawled out of sight and slept. There were
other incidents, still more blurred in his memory, but enough to recall
how loyal the whole little gang had been to him. He saw once more their
faces when they heard he was going away to college; blanched with
horror at the separation, lighting with pleasure when he promised to
return!
The years, how they had changed and separated! Where were they, these
who really belonged to him; who were his rightful companions? What had
the years done to them? And he had a duty toward them unperformed. How
was it that he had been in the city all these hours and not even
thought of going to look for those loyal souls who had stood by him so
faithfully when they were all mere babies? He must go at once. He had
lost his head over attempting to reach things that were not for him,
and this shock had come to set him straight.
Gravely he rose at last, these thoughts surging through his brain.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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