London's Heart: A NovelFarjeon, B. L. (Benjamin Leopold)
General
London's Heart: A Novel
Farjeon, B. L. (Benjamin Leopold)
London (England) -- Fiction
selfishness, out of our being unable, as it were, to wrest ourselves
from ourselves, and to live more in others. And then, after all, it
was but for a short time. Think of the life of a man. How short it is
in comparison with time! 'We are in the world,' he said, 'and should
be of the world.' 'Not against our sense of right,' I answered. 'The
noblest phase of human nature is to do what we believe to be right,
though all the world is against us, though we suffer through it, and
lose the pleasures of the world.' And what do you think this ingenious
young fellow did, Lily, when I said that? Laughed at me, and asked in
return whether there is not a dreadful arrogance in a man placing his
back against a rock, and saying to the world, 'You are all wrong; I
only am right.' Do I tire you, my child, with an old man's babble?"
"No, my dear," answered Lily; "I love to hear you talk so, although I
cannot understand the exact meaning of all you say."
Indeed, this "old man's babble" was soothing to Lily; his gentle voice
brought peace to her troubled heart.
"I have found out, my darling," continued Old Wheels, with a secret
delight at her calmer manner, "that this foolish young man, whom I
love like a son--ay, Lily, like my own son!--is fond of arguing
against himself, of placing himself in a disadvantageous light, of
saying things often that he does not mean. But I know him; I see his
heart and the rare nobility of his nature. Our argument ended thus,
'Come,' I said, 'answer me fairly. Can you believe in a man giving
judgment against himself?' 'If,' he said, 'by "yourself" you mean your
hopes, your desires, your heart's yearnings--and these, being in the
life of a man, comprise himself--I answer, yes. I can imagine a man
loving a thing, thirsting for it, believing that his life's happiness
is comprised in the possession of it, and yet standing by quietly,
and letting it slip from him, with his heart aching all the while!
There is a higher attribute than love,' he said. I asked him what it
was, and he answered, 'Duty!'"
Lily raised her head from the old man's breast; her eyes were bright,
her face was flushed.
"Do _you_ believe this, grandfather?"
The old man returned her earnest gaze, and was silent for many
moments. Some deeper meaning than usual was in their gaze, and
although neither of them could have explained how it had come about,
both by some mysterious instinct were aware of the solemn significance
which would attach to the answer of the girl's question. He placed his
arms tenderly about her, but not so as to hide his face from her.
"Yes, child," he said gently, "I believe it. But"--and his voice
trembled here, and his gaze grew more wistful--"not mistaken duty. If
I had a friend whom I loved, whom I trusted faithfully and implicitly,
whom I believed to be honest and true and single-hearted, I should--if
such a crisis in the conflict of love and duty should unhappily arise
in my life--take counsel from him."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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