In reality they had done more than they knew. Their kindly treatment of
him, coming just at the moment when he felt himself a social Ishmael,
rejected by all classes in turn, had given him back no small portion of
his self-respect. He could not help contrasting the delicate attentions
of Prince Herbert, the representative of the greatest House in Europe,
and an English gentleman to boot, with the pretentious compliments of
the poor waif of royalty from the Mediterranean whose bogus honours he
had stooped to accept a day or two before.
Nor could he resist the incense to his pride offered by the clumsy
abasement of the pickle-selling baronet. It was something to feel that
he still excited the envy of the Lawthorns and the Mendes. He might
be a bankrupt, but he was still Lord Alistair Stuart, and heir to one
of the greatest titles of Britain. The highest in the land still felt
affection for him; the noblest women thought him worthy of their
concern.
These reflections accompanied him on the way up to town the next
morning, and prepared him to face his public examination with a lighter
heart. After all, bankruptcy was not fatal to a man in his position. He
had nothing to lose. His creditors could not take the allowance made
him by his brother. But for Molly, indeed, he need not be a bankrupt
at all. But for her, and his quixotic refusal to abandon her, the
proceedings against him would have been dropped already, and he himself
would be enjoying the traditional honours of the returned prodigal.
Why had he refused to leave Molly? After all, was it not true that he
had exaggerated Molly’s claim on him? She had preferred him to Mendes,
doubtless, but her choice had not been taken from any exalted motive
of self-sacrifice. If it had been inspired by the hope that he would
marry her, it was a selfish choice enough. She knew pretty well that
Mendes would never do that. Yes, his refusal to leave her had been
quixotic--that was the right word. For her own sake, since it was
evident that she shrank from facing poverty with him, for her own sake
it would have been better to say good-bye.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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