‘Why, Lightfoot alone is worth the money!’
‘Minus the sand-crack.’
‘I deny the sand-crack. She was pricked in the shoeing.’
‘Of course! I never knew a broken knee that wasn’t got by striking the
manger, nor a sand-crack that didn’t come of an awkward smith.’
‘What a blessing it would be if all the bad reputations in society could be
palliated as pleasantly.’
‘Shall I tell Bobbidge you take his offer? He wants an answer at once.’
‘My dear major, don’t you know that the fellow who says that, simply means
to say: “Don’t be too sure that I shall not change my mind.” Look out that
you take the ball at the hop!’
‘Lucky if it hops at all.’
‘Is that your experience of life?’ said Walpole inquiringly.
‘It is one of them. Will you take £50 for the screws?’
‘Yes; and as much more for the break and the dog-cart. I want every rap I
can scrape together, Harry. I’m going out to Guatemala.’
‘I heard that.’
‘Infernal place; at least, I believe, in climate--reptiles, fevers,
assassination--it stands without a rival.’
‘So they tell me.’
‘It was the only thing vacant; and they rather affected a difficulty about
giving it.’
‘So they do when they send a man to the Gold Coast; and they tell the
newspapers to say what a lucky dog he is.’
‘I can stand all that. What really kills me is giving a man the C.B. when
he is just booked for some home of yellow fever.’
‘They do that too,’ gravely observed the other, who was beginning to feel
the pace of the conversation rather too fast for him. ‘Don’t you smoke?’
‘I’m rather reducing myself to half batta in tobacco. I’ve thoughts of
marrying.’
‘Don’t do that.’
‘Why? It’s not wrong.’
‘No, perhaps not; but it’s stupid.’
‘Come now, old fellow, life out there in the tropics is not so jolly all
alone! Alligators are interesting creatures, and cheetahs are pretty pets;
but a man wants a little companionship of a more tender kind; and a nice
girl who would link her fortunes with one’s own, and help one through the
sultry hours, is no bad thing.’
‘The nice girl wouldn’t go there.’
‘I’m not so sure of that. With your great knowledge of life, you must know
that there has been a glut in “the nice-girl” market these years back.
Prime lots are sold for a song occasionally, and first-rate samples sent as
far as Calcutta. The truth is, the fellow who looks like a real buyer may
have the pick of the fair, as they call it here.’
So he ought,’ growled out the major.
‘The speech is not a gallant one. You are scarcely complimentary to the
ladies, Lockwood.’
‘It was you that talked of a woman like a cow, or a sack of corn, not I.’
‘I employed an illustration to answer one of your own arguments.’
‘Who is she to be?’ bluntly asked the major.
‘I’ll tell you whom I mean to ask, for I have not put the question yet.’
‘A long, fine whistle expressed the other’s astonishment. ‘And are you so
sure she’ll say Yes?’
‘I have no other assurance than the conviction that a woman might do
worse.’
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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