She had the good fortune to be alone in a crowd. Her neighbour, a
grizzled old man with his daughters beyond, was her only neighbour, and
a stranger. At her left rose up the red-covered barricade over which she
could see the sanctuary and the curtain; and her seat in the tribune,
raised some eight feet above the floor, removed her from any possibility
of conversation. She was thankful for that: she did not want to talk;
she wanted only to control her faculties in silence, to reassert her
faith, to look out over this enormous throng gathered to pay homage to
the great Spirit whom they had betrayed, to renew her own courage and
faithfulness. She wondered what the preacher would say, whether there
would be any note of penitence. Maternity was his subject--that benign
aspect of universal life--tenderness, love, quiet, receptive, protective
passion, the spirit that soothes rather than inspires, that busies
itself with peaceful tasks, that kindles the lights and fires of home,
that gives sleep, food and welcome....
The bell stopped, and in the instant before the music began she heard,
clear above the murmur within, the roar of the crowds outside, who still
demanded their God. Then, with a crash, the huge organ awoke, pierced by
the cry of the trumpets and the maddening throb of drums. There was no
delicate prelude here, no slow stirring of life rising through
labyrinths of mystery to the climax of sight--here rather was full-orbed
day, the high noon of knowledge and power, the dayspring from on high,
dawning in mid-heaven. Her heart quickened to meet it, and her reviving
confidence, still convalescent, stirred and smiled, as the tremendous
chords blared overhead, telling of triumph full-armed. God was man,
then, after all--a God who last night had faltered for an hour, but who
rose again on this morning of a new year, scattering mists, dominant
over his own passion, all-compelling and all-beloved. God was man, and
Felsenburgh his Incarnation! Yes, she must believe that! She did
believe that!
Then she saw how already the long procession was winding up beneath the
screen, and by imperceptible art the light grew yet more acutely
beautiful. They were coming, then, those ministers of a pure worship;
grave men who knew in what they believed, and who, even if they did not
at this moment thrill with feeling (for she knew that in this respect
her husband for one did not), yet believed the principles of this
worship and recognised their need of expression for the majority of
mankind--coming slowly up in fours and pairs and units, led by robed
vergers, rippling over the steps, and emerging again into the coloured
sunlight in all their bravery of Masonic apron, badge and jewel. Surely
here was reassurance enough.
* * * * *
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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