Lost Sir Massingberd: A Romance of Real Life. v. 2/2Payn, James
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Lost Sir Massingberd: A Romance of Real Life. v. 2/2
Payn, James
Detective and mystery stories; Fiction
There are but few of us, I fear, who can say: "Though I should die
suddenly, and at the most unlooked-for time, there will be nothing left
behind me which I would have destroyed, even though I had had the
opportunity." Of course there are none who can boast that they are at
peace with all mankind; that they leave nothing unrepented of or
unatoned for; that their human affairs and social relations are exactly
where they would have wished them to be. But independent of these
matters, neglected by the very best of us, how eagerly must many a man
desire, between the warning and swift stroke of death, that he had had
but a little time--a little strength to set, not, indeed, his house in
order, but his desk and his note-book. What a cruel shock have many a
family received, after they have lost the Head whom they have worshipped
so many years, by discovering, where they looked for no such thing,
_after his death_, that he had all along (as will be thought) been even
such a one--_not_ as themselves, but worse--as they whom they had been
taught by his own self to look upon with contempt, or at least with
pity; as they who, by contrast with himself, were persons base and vile.
Is there no letter, reader, ragged and time-worn, perhaps, but still
legible, lying among that heap of correspondence you intend to winnow
some day--which it will be better to burn _now_? Is there no
half-forgotten gift, meant for your own eyes alone, when they were
brighter than at present, which it would be well to make an end of this
very day? Can you say: "Even though I do not return home to night, or
ever again, but am smashed by a railway locomotive, or driven over by a
'bus, or poisoned in a cab, yet there will be nothing of mine, nothing
when my friends take stock of my personal effects, of which I need be
ashamed." If so, thou art a good man indeed--or one of exceeding
prudence. Above all things, my friends, be good, for that is best; but
if not, at least be prudent. Let your memories be sullied with no stain,
at all events in the thoughts of those you leave at home. The actions of
the unjust blossom in their dust into flowers compared with which the
deadly nightshade is as the violet or the rose. The satirist tells us
that in a week, a month, a year at most, the memory of a dead man dies
even from the hearts of those he held most dear. This is not true; but
the satirist would have been severer yet, and have spoken truth as well,
had he said that the memory of a dead man, so far as his vice and
wickedness are concerned, dies not at all among his kin. It is spoken of
in whispers by the purest, and renders them less pure; it is made light
of by the vicious, but only to excuse their wrongful acts by a worse
example. "Wild as I may be, I am not so wild as the governor was in his
day," is a terrible legacy of comfort to leave behind one to one's son.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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