Love After Marriage; and Other Stories of the HeartHentz, Caroline Lee
General
Love After Marriage; and Other Stories of the Heart
Hentz, Caroline Lee
Fiction; Short stories, American
different stages; while all the time she knew it was herself who had
coldly and deliberately dried up the fountain of hope and joy, and
love, which had sent such roses to her cheek and sunbeams to her eye.
She sometimes trembled in the darkness of night, at the possibility
that Grace might die, under the regimen of this imaginary disease; and
then a voice whispered in hollow murmurs, in her ears, "Thou shalt
sleep no more, for thou hast murdered sleep." But in day's broad light
a witness to Roland's abstraction, anxiety and gloom, she steeled her
conscience, in reflecting on the necessity of the act. Let not Grace
be condemned, as too weak and yielding, as too blind an instrument in
the hands of another. Her education had been peculiar, and her natural
disposition was extremely sensitive and timid. The first years of her
life had been passed in terror and sorrow--terror for her father's
cruelty, and sorrow for her mother's woe. Everything around her was
tumultuous and fearful, and she learned to shudder at the awful
manifestations of evil passions, before she knew them by name.
Transplanted to a scene, where everything breathed of peace and
silence, where industry, neatness, and order were heaven's first laws,
where the voice of dissension was unheard, and the storms of passion
unfelt, her spirit had been so hushed and subdued, her sensibilities
so repressed, and her energies held down, she moved along her daily
path a piece of beautiful and exquisite mechanism, but whose most
powerful springs had never been touched. It is true she loved the kind
and gentle Shakers, but it was with a tranquil feeling of gratitude
and trust. The visit of Roland Gray acted as an electrical
communication between her and the world to which he belonged. It
seemed to her it must be inhabited by angels; and when Mr. Worthington
came and induced her benefactor to resign her to his care, she
welcomed the change as into the garden of Eden. In the seclusion of a
school, her timidity still induced her to shrink within herself; in
the companionship of Lucy, she felt awe-struck and abashed; but Roland
came, and then she realized the paradise of her imagination.
Everything around her was music and beauty and love--flowers sprang up
in the waste places, water gushed from the rock, and melody filled
the air. To be forbidden to think of him, to be commanded to wrench
him from her heart, to be made to think of herself as a low and
disgraced being--Grace would have shuddered at the idea of impiety,
but when she laid her head on her pillow, willing to be thought sick,
rather than wretched, she certainly wished to die. But the strength of
youth, though prostrated, rebounded from the pressure. She was not
doomed to the _curse of a granted prayer_. The Providence that had so
long watched over her destiny, still kept its unseen but slumbering
vigils. Grace remembered her old friends, the Shakers, and yearned
once more for their still and passionless existence. She prayed Mr.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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